Welcome to the new 'home' of PetWise by Judy!

Max's story: FOREVER HOME

2012-01-21T17:19:00.002-07:00

FOREVER HOME

Lately the urge to share our story has been relentless so I must take action in order to sleep restfully again. For over 2 months, Max has graced my life with his presence. Each of those days I’ve marveled at his gentle, loving, joyful, intelligent and yes, even timid way of being, saying aloud to him, “How could I ever possibly love you more?”…and then I do!

HOW IT BEGAN:

I'd been feeling pretty alone and wondering how to give my life more meaning, longing to share the love I know I have to offer. One day in October I was disheartened that no homeless dog's photo was touching me and I still wasn't sure about the 'old age' commitment.
Then, on October 16, a good facebook friend, Mel, posted a photo of her foster dog Lady saying I'd be a good mom and praising shelties, so I just decided to 'browse'. I kept landing on Max no matter what site I went to--hard to put my finger on exactly what singled Max out (or how he ‘found’ me). I could try to analyze it--beauty, size, age, male (after Black Jack)/my infinite patience--or perhaps down deep we simply knew we needed each other most...but regardless, there was an unmistakeable pull. Even after doing some homework on shelties & being told of Max's rough start with resulting “issues”, I still felt the same.
The write up on ‘Petfinder’ described Max as…young, shy, in foster care for the last year--socializing him…was in pretty poor shape but has made strides…still very shy, does much better with the foster mom than dad…very curious with other dogs…should be fine with cats…uncertain about kids…best in a quiet home with patient family…housetrained, uses dog door (to escape the foster dad or unwanted advances)…can be a barker when people come or go…a gentle soul, no indications of fear biting.

Instead of letting my head stop me with the 'what if's' I was able to allow my heart to lead in a stronger way.

I inquired about him…

Mackenzie's art

2011-06-26T13:54:00.003-07:00

Meet MACKENZIE who is deeply missed even having passed three years ago…

In his words: (3/9/11) ‘Through our very special mutual friend, Day, Mom Nancy & Judy met in March to discuss Judy’s doing artwork of me. My mom had a specific picture in her mind but no photo exactly depicting that. So with lots of snapshots and the best description she could verbalize, Judy was left to ‘do her thing’.

As is her creative way, Judy needed to ‘be with’ the idea and photos long enough that something ‘gelled’. But finally, I couldn’t wait any longer, so a couple of weeks later I woke Judy, gently prodding her to make arrangements to get together with my Mom Nancy again to clarify and finalize the design plans for my memorial drawing so the artwork could begin taking form.

Just days later, Judy met with Nancy.

Then later in the month, Judy & I had some alone time together so I could show her the way to shut my mouth which I had open in the mature photo Mom had chosen and make my eyes more round and soulful as my Mom & Dad remember me.

Additions, changes and suggestions like background, colors, etc. are never easy for an artist so work was slow since Judy always wants to be ‘led’ by her subject—me, in this case. I made sure that neither my Mom nor I pushed her.

On Mother’s Day I finally helped Judy want to work on the drawing for my Mom and great progress was made.

Then, gone for 3 years in June, I urged Judy to complete the drawing for my precious ‘Mom & Dad’. When they saw it, they were both well pleased. We all were a great team—my making sure no one pressured her even though we were excited for its completion and Judy being sure to work only when inspired.

Mom wrote on facebook, “Judy Nelson, the artistic genius, blessed us with a magnificent drawing of our Mackenzie, today. He is depicted as the ‘doodlebug’ (as we had named him) when he was a baby and his ‘goodbye’ pose, turning to look at us one last time before going to the bridge. We are eternally grateful for the time and love Judy devoted to doing this for us. I want [all my ‘friends’] to see how totally beautiful this is, although…much more spectacular in person... We can't stop staring at it.

[Judy] you are so special to us… have made us so happy..........it's like getting a little piece of Mackenzie back........he'll be looking at us from the wall every day! We will be doing Carlin and Minnie next for sure!!!!”’

Messages continue from my boy!!

2011-05-19T13:16:00.006-07:00

With Spring promising to arrive any day the butterflies are becoming even more affectionate--my 'always kisses' from Black Jack. Just the other day, one at a time, a white one, then a monarch and then a black one flirted with me.
It will always bring a smile of comfort to my face.
THANK YOU, my sweet boy Black Jack--my love forever!

PetWise #11 Katie Lou’s Angels!

2011-04-24T08:01:00.002-07:00

HAPPY EASTER everyone!!

Katie Lou’s Angels!

Next month, my beloved Katie Lou will have been gone for four years. She says it’s time for me to write of her two angels now. It’s comforting to know they were already around her during her illnesses and difficult passing.

When I picked up Katie’s remains, the beautiful little wooden urn made me think of a lovely ceramic angel I had purchased a while before as a possible gift for my daughter. It now sits atop the box as if made for it with another angel and light over it.

The vet’s kind sympathy card was adorned by yet another angel. My friend/pet ‘communicator’ told me that these two angels look just like the ones she saw around Katie before she left. In her last few days I often observed Katie looking up; just looking, not barking (which had become unusual)... Could it have been her angels reassuring her—as they still do me?

Before she passed, Katie had already decided to 'stick around' to be sure I know how much she loves me. Katie's spirit was communicating with me BEFORE she left, too! And it’s fun to know in this way she finally got to display her sense of humor both before and after she passed in her frequent antics coming and going in our house.

Often I was awakened by one solitary Katie-bark between about 2 and 4 a.m. The first few times I heard it of course I jumped out of bed as a vigilant mother would do only to find Katie still soundly asleep. And then several times after she died, the same thing happened. The final night of her visits I heard a huge, loud “WOOF!” that I knew couldn’t be her (and could NOT have been a dog outside). Since I’d not gotten the message thus far, I believe she brought Olga (our former Great Dane) along so that I’d finally realize what she was trying to tell me! Yes, she definitely ‘stuck around’—until I finally got the message--that she loves me deeply and is finally very healthy & happy!

Months later as I was taking my large bag of clothes to the Mission I spotted the big bag of comforters that were Katie’s bedding. I'd just not been able to part with them yet. I grabbed it knowing it was time. I didn't put it all together until I got home and 'felt' Katie's pleasure in her bedding being used to help keep others warm that winter.

Yet again I must say our pets are SO wise if we will just listen!

PetWise #10 “Cyber” dog talk?

2011-04-17T14:27:00.007-07:00

4/17/11 Over my pb&j today, the kitchen seemed unusually quiet and empty (yes, I actually took the time to sit at the table and force myself to finish chewing before I got up!). I began to realize that as time passes, it’s becoming more and more okay to know there will never be another Bubbles, Katie Lou or Black Jack in this lifetime, but that there will be another with different very special qualities.

Right away, thinking of the company of another pet companion, my pragmatic mind began rolling up my decorative area rugs and covering my white furniture remembering the messiness of canine old age. Then my positive nature kicked in reminding me that there were many, many years needing no precautions such as these.

Strangely it doesn’t feel as if these three are the ones ‘talking to me’. Earlier in the day I’d posted on PET PEOPLE how Target’s tragic murder was making a difference hopefully for thousands of pets who are now brought in to the shelter where the crime was committed. And of course daily I look forward to updates on dear Patrick’s progress, rescued just in time from certain death after unthinkable abuse. So while they aren’t here in body—any of them—it feels as if they are here gently guiding and reassuring me that all is in the ‘right and perfect order’—perhaps sharing their wet, slobbery ‘cyber kisses’, too.

And the WINNER of the facebook PET PEOPLES’ FUNNIEST or MOST EMBARRASSING PET MOMENT

2011-04-16T16:10:00.002-07:00

WINNER: CONGRATULATIONS Pete & Susan Rakay! Susan wrote: "I was feeding and getting fresh water for my birds one day an after I took out Pete's bowl I turned away to get another of the birds bowls. Well Pete thought he saw a silly sight, my naked bum, so he stuck his head out of the bowl opening and bit my butt."
So Pete & won (for one of the pooches in their family) a hoodie with up to 10 letters for a slogan from Poochpark Wear, http://www.poochparkwear.com

Yet another runner up in the Facebook PET PEOPLES’ FUNNIEST or MOST EMBARRASSING PET MOMENT

2011-04-08T16:06:00.004-07:00

Susan wrote: "I had had Princess for only a few weeks when one night, after I put my birds to bed, I was looking for her to give her the nite-nite cookie my dogs get every night before bedtime. I call her over and over and searched the house. She was no ware to be found. I found my flashlight and went looking for her outside, still calling her name. No luck. I got in the car, rolled down the window and started driving my neighborhood calling her name. No luck. I went down the large street near my house and drove it to town, looking and calling all the way. No luck. I saw some activity down one of the side streets so I went down to see if maybe she had an accident, Police said no but took her description and my phone number just in case. I started to drive further back in my subdivision calling her name. Still no luck. By this time I was horse from calling her name, after all it was January so the night was cold. I decided to go home and get something to drink and use the bathroom. Sitting on the commode I asked my other dog Oliver "where could Princess be" and it was then I heard the light scratching on the bird room door. I opened the door and there was Princess, safe at home the whole time. I had checked the bird room before closing the door but she outsmarted me by hiding behind the door the whole time. I never thought to look in there as the dogs are not allowed in there and I thought she would answer when I called. Well it happened again yesterday. Same scenario, but this time I checked the bird room and there she was. Save me from loosing my voice again."

Another runner up in facebook PET PEOPLES’ FUNNIEST or MOST EMBARRASSING PET MOMENT

2011-04-04T09:50:00.002-07:00

Linsey Bise says, "My husband left his chip bag unattended for 1 minute and returned to find our 3 year old Sphynx cat, King Tut, helping himself! This picture always brings the LOL's!"

Runner up in PET PEOPLES’ FUNNIEST or MOST EMBARRASSING PET MOMENT Contest on facebook!

2011-04-02T17:40:00.002-07:00

"My dog Pudder's not a barker and one day he went missing. My daughter and I scoured the neighborhood stopping people strolling down the street and working in their yards to no avail. I knew if someone found him they would never give him back because he is just too sweet and lovable. We went home to figure out another course of action when I decided to go back upstairs and look. Nope... but as I began to descend the stairs I realized that I had not looked in the utility closet. Lo and behold! There was Pudder. The little brat heard us calling and let us look forever! We were glad to have found him and laughed about it for some time. He's such a goofball. :)

PetWise #9 Patrick's influence!

2011-03-28T13:09:00.003-07:00

PetWise 3/28/11 #9 Patrick’s influence!

So many times other pet lovers and I have been unable to deny that our pets have profound truths to teach us. Recently I’ve been wondering why Patrick’s plight has touched me so very deeply, to the point of feeling that I’ve almost ‘adopted him’ as my own. Perhaps this is a part of why I’ve felt no urge yet to find someone to fill the huge footprints my boy Black Jack left behind.

Today I happened to turn to one of the most FUN and most insightful books I’ve ever read, GUARDIANS OF BEING. With the light hearted cartoons of the gifted Patrick McDonnell, the words of renowned spiritual teacher, Eckhart Tolle the messages seem to take on a joyful life of their own.

The explanation for my strong affinity to Patrick just might lie in this statement from the book, “They have been with humans for thousands of years and now there is a link between dogs and humans much closer than it has ever been.”

I was also touched by a lesson already evident from Patrick voiced herein, “You just watch the tail…with some dogs you just look at them—just a little look is enough—and their tail goes ‘LIFE IS GOOD! LIFE IS GOOD!’ And they are not telling themselves a story of why life is good. It’s a direct realization.” REGARDLESS of what we humans may judge to have been Patrick’s tortuous life thus far, without these judgments he is simply being Who he is & loving life in each moment (like breakfast this morning)!

Oh, how I long to transcend the wild thoughts of my human brain to live more simply in this ‘joy of being’…the tail wagging part might be difficult—LOL!

Speaking to the hearts of CHILDREN seems to be one of the most essential tools I can think of for responding to the urgent need evident today for the transformation of consciousness and the creation of a more enlightened humanity to come. Patrick has written two children’s books that might be a wonderful way for us to help them understand our oneness and thereby become compassionate citizens.

This is the link to McDonnell’s website where you can sign up to get daily messages http://muttscomics.com/default.aspx

This is the link to checking out the book from which I’m quoting

http://www.amazon.com/Guardians-Being-Eckhart-Tolle/dp/1577316711/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1301338080&sr=1-1#reader_1577316711

Here is one of his children’s books, his 6^th picture book this one featuring his beloved Earl

http://www.amazon.com/Wag-Patrick-McDonnell/dp/B004HB1D4U/ref=sr_1_6?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1301338080&sr=1-6#reader_B004HB1D4U

And another children’s book offered by Amazon

http://www.amazon.com/Gift-Nothing-Special-Patrick-McDonnell/dp/0316054410/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1301338080&sr=1-4#reader_0316054410

I strongly encourage you to check them out not only for yourself but for others in your life that you love and perhaps for future generations! I for one don’t want to miss any of the messages our pets so freely offer us…

PetWise #8 - IMAGINATION OR TRUTH?!

2011-03-18T12:01:00.002-07:00

Have you ever had an idea or thought from ‘out of the blue’ that seemed either like it was too good to be true or too ‘far out’ to be do-able?

PART I: Mom did (and sometimes still does) often dismissing them, having grown up being told to be ‘realistic’. But working with our inexplicable “energy” always having surrounded her artwork of our images, we’re happy to announce that she’s finally learning to pay more attention!

“I helped!!” shouts Black Jack as he scurries past to his next duty. He suggested (through Kat) that Mom listen carefully during the artistic process so she could share that priceless interaction with the pets’ humans. “And she has (like with Mackenzie)!” comes the echo from afar. More about that later, but back to the message…

In the past Mom has had a couple of profound experiences with the energy of two of her ‘human heroes’, felt so strongly there was no denying it. Earlier this week her friend described a recent similar experience but decided she must have wanted it to be true so badly that it surely must not be the loved one she felt with her at all but a figment of her imagination instead. It took an unsolicited confirmation to convince her. This is Mom’s friend/massage therapist who can speak with other’s departed loved ones but ironically mistrusts her own intuitive gift for herself. This seems to be a problem with many of you ‘tuned in’ humans…

Now Black Jack stops by to share again, “Several times in the past weeks when Mom pulled into the garage, she vividly recalled how I would wait for her with my nose pressed to the garage door opening and upon hearing the car, howl my greeting. She also considered it only her imagination, deciding even if it were, it made her smile. I want her to believe I was really there instead of dampening the warmth of those moments with her doubt.”

“And,” he goes on, “what about those little black caterpillars Mom’s week pulling disturbed the other day? Could it just be, as she imagined, that I put them there to reminder her of the beautiful black butterfly I sent to her earlier?

Voices now unite to say, “Trust that when you think of us, we are there! We are One with you. Thoughts are indeed things and so we’re always with you.”

PART II Just like memories and imagination, Mom sometimes has ideas that seem to come from nowhere—but we all know they really DO come from SOMEWHERE. Until recently she has often put them aside immediately as being too grandiose.

First we need for her to know tif they keep returning she needs to take it as a sign that some Power bigger than she is wants her to take action on them.

While we pets just enjoy them in the moment, you humans seem to want to remember your dreams. Remembering dreams can be elusive, just like ideas. In fact Mom has a whole dream diary of her night time experiences, most of which are merely entertaining to her, sometimes, bizarre, rarely scary.

That “Bigger Power” (which includes us, of course) is what plants those seed ideas in Mom’s mind whether thought or dream. Then it’s up to her to nurture that seed with trust that the soil that is HER has what it takes to co-partner with the seed, creating something grand. Because these ideas can be lost in all the jumble of you humans’ busy minds and lives, we’ve urged her to keep paper and pen handy so she can take action—usually the next morning (sometimes in the middle of the night) as happened with the idea for this very blog article.

“Way to go, Mom!” comes the canine chorus.

SO our INVITATION to you all is: “IMAGINE what you “dream up” IS THE TRUTH! Then enjoy the warm comfort of being wrapped in that memory…OR move mountains with your ‘do-able’ idea!!”

P.S. this was going to be a short article, but once again, guess we had lots to say…

PetWise #7 - THE WAY OF THE ARTIST...

2011-03-16T16:10:00.003-07:00

Mom’s natural gift for artwork has blessed the human families of our cousins, ancestors and buddies on the other side (sometimes human likenesses, too) for 25 years by preserving our memories on paper or in other mediums. “I get to take credit for that,” quips Bubbles, “since it was her grief and aloneness in my passing that started it all. Sure, she thought it was her own idea, but my image in photos moved her to draw me on paper to help her feel better.” We know her face will be red when we sing our ♫♪CONGRATULATIONS symphony♫♪ to her. We are so proud that she always honored that gift with only a few brief ‘detours’—but we were always able to get her back on course.

Now she has another very special love to memorialize with a pencil portrait. Here Mackenzie takes over, saying, “I got my momma and Judy together because I know they’re alike in heart. Seeing Judy’s artwork, my momma knew she wanted Judy to recreate my loving eyes for her to gaze into for the rest of her life. They agreed that it must be inspired (by me) so there’d be no deadline for completion.”

He adds wisely, “Since Judy has an otherwise full life I didn’t begin reminding her (speaking to her) until a couple of days ago and then I was all she could think about!”

“First the design” Mackenzie continues, “Momma wants me drawn as a puppy and also in my final years, standing looking back as if to say a final good-bye. (I may convince her to add a ‘teen’ picture yet…) But with the 2 poses she wants, my face will be pretty small to show my soulful eyes, so I need to help Judy figure out how to do that. Judy seems to be resisting, so I’m working with her to get past her preferences and that her gift really lies in expressions, not so much all the hair I had.”

“So,” the rest of the gang concludes, “as is Mom’s way, she’s mulling over the situation/visualizing what needs to be done. This always requires some quiet time, therefore the project has slowed…good thing there’s no time limit. Seems this is the way many artists do their best, most inspired work! We can’t wait to see it finished…no, wait, it’s agreed, no rush—ha ha!”

PetWise #6 - IS LOVE ENOUGH?

2011-02-27T17:02:00.011-07:00

PetWise through Judy

2/27/11 #6 Is love enough…?

Katie Lou and Mom are both ready to tell her story now. They both have been reluctant because it’s sort of painful to remember this part of their time together. Katie’s ancestors were Lhasa Apsos that Mom would discover too late not only had physical/neurological problems, but also tended toward aggression.

“I was separated from Mom for a short period during my puppyhood, but she embraced me with her whole heart when I returned, even unkempt and flea ridden” Katie reveals.

“Early in my life I began teaching her what my boundaries were—for example, I wanted little to no attention once I had ’settled in’ for the night or I’d ‘come up fighting’. I always tried not to hurt her too much even in that state of grogginess. I also felt compelled to nip at other people sometimes,” she confesses, “until I became COMPLETELY unpredictable, which was doubly dangerous since I was too cute to resist >smile<. Eventually I had to be ‘quarantined’ during ANYONE’S visit!”

Then there was the shock collar incident Mom has a hard time talking about when she got talked into because Katie barked too much at a friend’s neighbors. I do believe she may have lost a little more of her mind over this. Katie suggests, “Humans really ought to try it on themselves sometime! When Mom reached her hand under my chin later on that day, without thinking, I reacted so fast I drew blood, but still Mom kept right on loving me!”

“Eventually Mom thought maybe I was having some sort of ear problem or perhaps even bad teeth because I did it again—a more severe bite and to make it worse, I couldn’t seem to let go this time!” exclaims Katie. This reaction was NOT understandable to either of them. Katie’s health was excellent, so Mom got her checked out and her teeth cleaned which helped for a while.

She goes on, “When I wasn’t having these episodes, I loved to love on Mom, cuddle, and be a normal canine ‘kid’ especially thrilled with ‘mothering’ all my stuffed toys. I even played with Black Jack sometimes. More often as time passed, though, I bullied him and made his life to be a bit like hell.”

So Mom simply had to do something. One of the pet communicators she sought out, who also tried a sort of electric type of therapy a sort of re-programming presumably, claimed to discover that in a past life I was devoured by my off-spring. “Well that would most certainly have given me a bad attitude for this life!” Kate shouts.

Another endeavor to control her behavior was obedience training, which was probably the most traumatic attempt to solve the problem. Mom was advised that all dogs need to be shown who is in charge. “Consequently for months we lived a nightmare nightly as Mom followed this program rigidly, keeping me CAGED through the night. I know she is now so sorry (more of that ‘guilt’) she listened to anyone other than her own heart. You see I had always had a phobic fear of being caged—even at the groomers.” She sadly admits, “It felt like I literally lost even more of her mind through this ordeal.”

“Our lives became so unbearable that Mom actually considered assisting me to LEAVE. Even when not caged, I began wandering the house at night barking at random and so Mom very rarely slept during these several years. She tried comforting me, even lying on the floor beside me, but nothing worked”, she continues. “I so much appreciate Mom for making a total commitment to me for my entire lifetime even at her own expense. But then regardless of this tormented time together she and I both knew we had an inexplicable bond that went even deeper than any of her other dogs.”

With sadness, she says, “Then just before my 16^th birthday it was finally time…that day after my daily walk, my body suddenly also began to fail. I was weak and didn’t want to eat or drink anything. Although Mom nursed me for days and had a vet try, her gifted healer friend told her I trusted her to quickly give me release not only from this physical decline but the mental agony as well. Since I was nearly uncontrollable in spite of my physical weakness, the kind vet who put me out of my misery for Mom told her it appeared to him that I may have had a brain tumor.”

There are so many messages for everyone in this story such as all the what ifs of hindsight… inbreeding… foresight (medical advancements now available)… mostly though, that love transcends all…

P.S. she adds, “I’ll have Mom write about my angels sometime.”

PetWise #5

2011-02-16T08:47:00.004-07:00

All One Spirit?

Mom really loves her time spent with Day, the spirit communicator who helped with our passing, Katie Lou and Black Jack agree…not to mention the amazing healing massages she gives. Well, she shared that a lone small white butterfly accompanied her on a portion of her walk the other day which we all know is simply going to always be Black Jack and her ‘thing’ (just like leaves skipping along with her are Katie’s messengers)!! Then Mom wanted to show Day the little red rock heart that she had discovered in the street a while back. It was resting on Kate Lou’s special shelf, positioned for best display. As they were admiring it, Day saying she’s always thought of it as a ‘gift’ to her, Mom noticed she’d inadvertently placed it right next to the red heart shaped name tag that Katie always wore—she was filled with gratitude to Katie for giving her such a precious gift, even if it took her a while to realize it was from Katie Lou!

Then Day shared a recent very special experience involving the spirit of a loved one who arrived ahead of her to assist with a big purchase! This began a discussion about whether spirits of loved ones are still here with us after they’ve passed on to possibly another life and time. After Mom’s experiences with us—all of us lately—she assured Day she thought the we must all have ‘moved on’ by now but because Spirit includes all of us from forever into eternity, they could surely still be with us, too—in more than one place/time at a given moment. So the two of them simply agreed to leave it a mystery, choosing to believe what was in their hearts that gave them the most comfort.

Then just yesterday Mom saw the lone white butterfly again...and this time ALSO, in a different location, what appeared to be a magnificent Monarch (although Mom isn’t up on butterfly species very well)!! She just knew this butterfly was very large with brilliant blue flecks in its yellow & black tail. It allowed her to get very close and she admired it fully.

Now, could we say maybe, just maybe these ‘gifts’ are confirmation that trusting we are always with our beloved humans, no matter what experience the ‘other side’ is providing, could be true?!

Or do we have to send bigger, more beautiful or whimsical messengers yet??!!

PetWise #4

2011-02-14T17:46:00.005-07:00

PetWise through Judy

Time for a new ‘love’?

“Hey, this feels very strange! I finally ‘get it’ that I don’t have to rush home from my grocery shopping because someone is waiting, depending on me!” After living her life for others beginning with her birth family then husband and child, and always her beloved pets, Mom is finally just beginning, for the first time ever, to understand the mixed blessing of freedom. She can get a full night’s sleep and begin to give to herself.

While the reality is that there is NOT someone waiting to love her when she comes in the door or accompany her on her walks and trips can make her feel sad, in her case, it’s important for her to feel all the ramifications of that freedom so this time she can choose that responsibility for herself when the time feels right to her.

This can be a really confusing time for her, too. Recently celebrating her friend’s newly adopted Layla, who is the ‘spitting image’ of Bubbles, certainly gave her pause. She was left wondering, will she know when the right time for a ‘new love’ IS. Well, the obvious answer is that it’s unique to all humans AND us animals, too.

Bubbles, no longer able to remain silent, suggests, “Here’s one example of choosing too soon (which--no accidents--happened to be the RIGHT time for Mom and me!). I was adopted with the best intentions for the family’s only child, Robyn, when she was just 7 years old. As is so very often the case under those circumstances, after all the snuggling and cuddling on my adorable fluffy puppy hood, the child lost interest and my care and feeding fell to my Mom.”

“Years later,” Sugar I takes over, “Robyn felt ready so I became a member of the family. Then the Dad had Olga the Great Dane, Mom had Bubbles and the child had me, in the fluffy little white cockapoo body. I suppose we looked a bit like a canine version of the 3 bears!”

“Through the fun times and some health challenges, my best friend Robyn grew to womanhood, leaving for college and work”, Sugar continues. “She labored over whether I’d be happier in a more stable home, better able to manage my health, but she just couldn’t bring herself to make such a choice, my care and maintenance once again falling to Mom—for a while. Boy, I had lots of adventures with both of my girls for a whole 18 ½ years! Tenderly, peacefully passing in my child/woman’s arms was devastating to her after such a long, meaningful relationship. It was four whole years before she could even entertain the thought of ‘replacing me’.”

Thinking maybe a retriever would be a nice companion, one day Robyn found herself just ‘browsing’ the internet for such a dog who might need her. Sadly, finding no one in Arizona, she was about to turn from the computer when she decided to just check out one more Retriever Rescue organization.

“Well, it was instant passionate LOVE when she saw my beautiful red face!” a voice exclaims. “Only trouble was I was in Louisiana. And another slight problem—my name was also SUGAR!”

But the connection was so very strong there were no insurmountable problems.

“Surely some real magic was happening here”, the second Sugar goes on, “Turns out I was a pure Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever NAMED SUGAR II! Yes, my new Mom had thought of giving me a different name, but when she discovered it actually written down as Sugar II on my health records, it was sealed. We’ve been a perfect match from the git go, too.”

So we’re telling our stories today to remind Mom and anyone else who may be struggling with ‘WHEN is the right time for a new love’ to relax into memories of us until the mind will allow us through your heart to choose—whether it turns out to take just one day or a whole decade!

And Mom wants to add a special footnote today: “I wondered again why it felt like I was procrastinating finishing this article and understand now that my job is taking care of unresolved issues from my past in order to even more fully give as well as receive love the next time around. But even more importantly to remember to thank my sweet, troubled Katie Lou for showing me I am capable of a magnificent unconditional love and my devoted boy, Black Jack, for reaffirming that lesson for me.”

Surely there’s a higher wisdom at work here…

PetWise #3

2011-01-28T16:18:00.002-07:00

BUBBLES'S OVERDOSE!

Our ideas have really been interrupting Mom’s thoughts lately…or could it also be her artistic side that we all learned to appreciate during our lives with her? Sometimes it looked (and felt to her) like simple procrastination, however more often than not, after such a delay she was able to say, ‘Okay, now I see why I waited.’ Then because it was 30 some years ago, she had search for just the right photos! But we digress…

Days ago, Mom could sense that Katie Lou was no longer as anxious to tell her mental health story, no doubt off doing something else which was her bent during much of her earthly life—spent in a ‘world of her own’. Consequently Mom once again had to relax into this quandary before retiring one night.

“SO I had her dream about ME,” Bubbles quips, “as a very old dog, but with enough energy left to lick her madly with my healthy teeth and gums as she picked me up from a babysitter.”

And that was a loud enough message for Mom to be inspired to let Bubbles share the first memorable health experience of her life.

“From the first time they saw me as a fluffy puppy, naming me Bubbles, I was exuberant, even ‘talking too much’, I’m told. I never wanted them out of my sight, either, so it was no surprise they enjoyed taking me with them to places like the Oregon beach as well as into the Idaho mountains to pick huckleberries or mushrooms.”

At this, Olga, Sugar I and Lobo all get dreamy looks remembering those same happy-go-lucky times with the family.

Not only mushrooms flourished in the cool, moist climate of the wooded hills, however, but also ticks, not to mention gigantic mosquitoes, so they tried a preventive measure this one time. Meant to keep those pests from Bubbles’s very curly coat, their favorite veterinarian mixed a concoction he used for horses, theoretically reducing the dosage to suit the size of a medium to small dog.

“On this week end”, Bubbles continues, “I typically bounded exuberantly out of the car running down the gravel road as fast as my feet would carry me! Mom laughed as my U-turn skid sent me sprawling. Then up the hill I raced with my family close behind. Always sure footed, Mom was surprised when I stumbled and fell. Looking more closely she saw a bit of blood on my lip and thought I’d fallen in a small hole nearby. But they realized I was in trouble when I growled at Dad as soon as he approached me. So Mom had to carry me (not a small dog) in her arms all the way back down the mountain.”

Everyone nods, wisely agreeing that love (and adrenalin) gives humans and animals alike the strength to do mighty things!

“My body quickly became lifeless and I began having trouble breathing!” Bubbles quickly goes on. “Mom was more afraid than I, not only because I was in her comforting embrace, but probably because she knew the vet’s office was 20+ miles down the mountain and in addition, it was a week end! Soon she heard a gurgling sound coming from deep in my chest and wondered desperately if I was going to die in her arms.”

The ride and the wait to rouse the vet seemed endless to everyone. The diagnosis was a strychnine-like poisoning brought on by the error in dosage—an ‘overdose’! “All just to keep the ticks & mosquitoes off me!”

Bubbles adds, “Of course the veterinarian was remorseful as he administered an antidote which took a bit (seemingly much longer) to restore all my vital signs, too. There were no charges…and no side effects, but I don’t recall seeing that vet again, either. I’m happy to report that I continued to hike, carefree, with the family—pests and all!”

Moral of the story: maybe experimenting with beloved pets, blindly believing those with lots of initials behind their names (without a second opinion) isn’t a very good idea!

Black Jack's BUTTERFLY reminding us love never dies!

2011-01-17T13:38:00.003-07:00

On 9/14/10 the butterflies were orange and plentiful!! Today my boy sent one lone messenger! Shortly after he died in August, Black Jack sent a heart shaped cloud & sunshine yellow butterflies as messengers for me and finally these golden ones. The entire time he was in his body, he was always “flitting about” --one of the “busiest” little beings I’d ever met. Since he’s told me he’s just that busy now in his new life, I’m grateful that he once again took the time to give me a ‘high five’ by sending only ONE beautiful orange/golden butterfly again today—in the middle of January, NO other butterflies to be seen anywhere. I'm taking that as a sign that my pets are loving their speaking through me with my blogging AND OF COURSE that love simply never dies!

PetWise #2

2011-01-16T16:42:00.003-07:00

No guilt, no regrets!!

“Me, me, me! I’ve been shouting in Mom’s ear since she was invited to blog…sure hope she lets me go first,” Katie Lou shouts but is gently interrupted by Olga’s deep booming baritone. “You’ll get your turn, since your story is very important, too, Katie. But remember how it took our working together to get Mom to just finally receive the message we tried to deliver to her after you died? You would come to her and bark night after night trying to let her know you were okay—then eventually we came together that last night and I did the ‘woof’.”

Katie responds, “Yes, Mom thought you were just reinforcing my trying to tell her that I was okay. I see where you’re going with this now,” she says, suggesting that Count might help tell some of this important story.

Count the Basset Hound is indeed ready to share his part of this story! “I was Mom’s very first dog and quite a character I might add. I ruled the roost as they say, helping myself to clothes off the line and barking like mad when my humans were at work—until the neighbor’s complained. One time Mom came home to a house filled with blankets & down from pillows—seems I’d decided I wanted ‘my’ bed in the living room. I was quite the entertainer, even sitting up on my haunches to ‘beg’. But, man, I didn’t want anything to do with that miniature human they brought into the house, seemingly to replace me. Since my humans thought I was no longer happy in my own home, I suddenly found myself ‘shipped out’ to a large farm with lots of children and boy, the rest of my days couldn’t have been happier!”

Olga continues, “I was Mom’s second dog and so we got to learn lots of things together. I was a very large Great Dane for a female, almost as big as Mom, but so gentle that our lessons were of a different kind, like my awkward learning to go up steps and what carpeted floors were. I used to sleep beside their king sized waterbed and my twitching at night would awaken her. The pot roasts ‘mysteriously’ disappeared when left on the counter, and the sheer size of my ‘droppings’ seemed something my humans had to get used to. Then there was my fondness for lying on the basement steps and chewing on them—the hot seasoning they tried to stop me with, making them even tastier!”

“I loved finally escaping from my custom built kennel to run in the mountains near their cabin. I’m told I was so graceful I looked like a deer and so my humans were concerned for my safety from hunters. Those were the days,” she says fondly.

“But all too soon as is often the case with us big gals, my health began failing. My family was so distraught they didn’t know what to do for me. So when they found a family who lived in a rural area claiming to be able to improve my condition, they very sadly agreed I should live with them. I did get lots better and loved roaming every day on the ranch. Mom was so happy when she would get those reports, thinking that had been the best choice for me.”

Her tone changes, “Then one day out of the blue several neighboring dogs decided mine was their turf and attacked me! My mild manner and aging body made it impossible for me to fight them off… Needless to say when Mom found out my end had been so brutal she never really recovered.”

“Katie and I were not only trying to reassure Mom that Kate was okay,” Olga explains, “but when I came with her that last night we wanted her to realize all of us are whole, happy and healthy now, here on the other side. You see, no matter how peaceful or tragic the end of our lives on earth may have seemed, all of that is forgotten and forgiven here. So any judgment, blame, guilt, remorse, regret is really just wasted energy on the part of all truly devoted companion animals’ guardians. Please, humans, we’re here to BE love whether it’s returned or not—that’s called unconditional love. Everyone’s lives change so your loving intention to be with us forever, providing what you feel is the best possible care is what really matters. I can say this because I loved my family enough to crawl partially sedated after I was ‘fixed’ attempting to get home to them. We love you completely—when will you get that?! We keep trying to show you that those useless emotions like regret (that we’re wise enough not to even bother with) serve no purpose. So to see and hear you spending precious time wishing things had been different is not the way we want you to live. Let’s move forward remembering the wonderful times!”

PetWise #1

2011-01-09T17:43:00.008-07:00

PetWise through Judy

Everybody’s story counts!!

Mom had received an invitation to begin blogging again, promising to think about it, with the intention of taking action—which is really all it takes! Having ‘put it to bed’, she could feel the ideas begin growing from that little seed… Then on January 9, Mom finally brought herself to put ‘our’ Christmas tree away as she was watching the CBS Sunday News program. All of us are so pleased that she ‘listened to us’ and decorated her home with mementos of us to comfort her through the holiday season, “especially since I just left 5 months ago and she isn’t ready for another pet just yet,” Black Jack pipes in. She was still pondering what she could blog about when she heard author David Sadaris say on the TV that people don’t want to hear about themselves, but rather prefer feeling they are being entertained through stories about animals!

FINALLY on facebook she saw this title, “The Human is Very Clever, but the Dog is Much More Clever” on a NATO Training Mission

article and FINALLY it clicked that WE’RE the ones

who need to ‘talk’. Sometimes our

people can be pretty dense, can’t they?

She MIGHT have

‘gotten it’ if she’d remembered how he

r blogging originally evolved… Black Jack tells the story, “I was so enjoying my alone time with Mom after Katie Lou left,

that

I wanted to stay for a very long time. I spent less and less time entertaining her; my aging making her life progressively more difficult at best. So, lovin

g movies as she does, one day she took a break to see the movie JULIE & JULIA where Julie, not too happy with her life, took up the hobby of cooking, blogging

about it. Thus the idea to blog about her experiences caring for me was born for Mom. It helped her, but wasn’t always as upbeat as Mom is, s

o I had to step in to tell her that I wanted to tell my OWN STORY. Because I appreciated all she did for me and was now able to tell her so, this made her happy and we

both hoped it might help lighten other canine geriatric care givers’ loads. Well, after she honored my request to help me leave, she lost her inspiration to blog—until

NOW when we can ALL have a voice through her.

I can speak

for us all—WE’RE EXCITED!”…

And, really, who do you think moved Dr. Jed Schaible to suggest she resume blogging by being a guest blogger on the prestigious VetLIVE blog? Her first response to that invitation was that while she is unquestionably PASSIONATE about treating all animals with respect, she didn’t consider herself to be an 'expert' on much of anything animal related other than her own inner feelings--and perhaps how we animals work directly with and through her on her ARTWORK.

Not only do you humans have wonderful stories to tell so that you can learn from one another, but we do, too and are so happy that Mom is listening—and willing to PASS OUR WISDOM ALONG! The world needs YOUR stories, too…

My 'doggie' Christmas tree!

2010-12-09T16:45:00.003-07:00

As of yesterday, December 8, my beloved boy Black Jack had been gone 4 months. Without either Katie Lou (who passed in 2007) or him here for the holidays, I was sort of missing them. SO I decorated my Christmas tree with some of their favorite stuffed toys to feel closer to them.

They so loved their 'babies'...especially Katie. She used to line them up on the couch when I was gone and tried to take them outside with her--Black Jack preferred his big floppy monkey (not pictured). This tree is bringing back wonderful memories and lots of smiles for me this holiday season. I'm sharing so that others of you might do the same if it would give you the same comfort! (Note my drawings of each of them 'watching over' the tree...)

MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR from all 3 of us...!!

At last another message from BLACK JACK!

2010-11-15T18:02:00.004-07:00

11/15/10 Another long awaited message from my precious boy, BLACK JACK! Day was here again this afternoon and shared with me that he always knows when she’s coming to give me my massage. Today during her drive, she was deep in thought, wondering if she’d made a wise choice in her life (similar to the difficult choice I had to make to help Jack leave his aged body 3 months ago). He came to her with the gift of comforting rapturous warmth, love, happiness.
She knew it was not only an affirmation that she had done the loving thing but also a message for his Mom, too. He wanted to remind me how blissfully happy he is and most importantly that I never forget how much he will forever love me. I always made sure in my lifetime with him that he was comfortable, cozy and warm in winter and so he was now returning that magnificently soothing, reassuring feeling to both of us. What more could a mother wish for…?

Black Jack's BUTTERFLY FRIEND!

2010-10-12T17:19:00.003-07:00

10/12/10 I have now adopted one of Black Jack's golden yellow butterfly friends--wounded! As you can see his wings just don't work right. I found him on Monday morning 10/11 trying valiantly to fly from my back patio. Right away I took him out to the weeds in the field where they like to play. Since it's getting colder at night I was concerned but he was still clinging in the same spot the next morning, wings folded to the side. All day Tuesday I 'worried' over him, bringing him in out of the heat and sun attached to a branch of the plant he was perched on. When I could safely do so, he went back outside in the shade and this morning he was still in the same condition.
He's inside again, this time on one of my misted houseplants. I feel helpless to try to 'fix' his broken wings and was pretty sad about that on Monday. The average butterfly lifespan is 2 to 14 days...up to 3 weeks... some live to 11 months and the Monarch a year... female butterflies have longer lives than males... I wonder how long I will be graced with his/her presence? AND I wonder what the message is...

More messages from my 'kids'!!

2010-09-30T14:21:00.002-07:00

9/30/10 I couldn’t wait to share with anyone who wants to 'listen' that there is no way I can ever feel alone! Today a “KATIE LOU leaf” appeared--no tree to match—the same kind that romped along beside me shortly after she died. THEN, a magnificent BLACK butterfly hovered around me…after all the colored ones BLACK JACK has sent since he passed, how could this not be a ‘howdy’ from my boy--AND my girl?!

BLACK JACK'S Farewell!

2010-09-27T15:40:00.003-07:00

9/27/10 Mom felt like my dying simply “ripped a piece right out of her heart” I know, but I keep telling her we had it all. What’s really important is to remember that we both filled one another’s hearts so full and blessed one another so much during our many years together. I immediately and for almost two months now have kept telling Mom that I am very happy and busy, so she did begin feeling better right away.
My love still surrounds and inspires her just as it did when I was there in body. Nevertheless she has felt like she’s sort of been floundering. You see, Mom has always strived to be her best, to serve in the greatest capacity. Without me to care for she has felt as if she needs to be doing more than just nurturing herself, going into that quiet place where she can get the answers for moving forward in the best direction for her. Well, I sure did ‘message’ her the other day! She took a few minutes to journal (when she was not feeling it would be under the pressure of a “should”). Her mind finally went blank for further writing so she got up discouraged that her writing hand didn’t give her any more clues.
This time an email offered her an inspiration. It relieved her to realize that being gentle with herself, simply asking for guidance and then letting the answers happen is the very best way for her to be living right now. No striving, struggle, pushing, impatiently trying to force ‘getting on with’ her life—as quite frankly has always been her inclination.
Although Mom does very little cooking, a cooking blog movie had moved Mom to begin blogging about my aging and care, eventually giving me the reins to write it through her. So this time, ironically (no accident, really) a cooking blog writer began by sharing some very personal feelings which gave Mom the idea once again. She thought, “Maybe it’s time to get back to blogging again…it would keep me writing not only to satisfy that creative urge, but also give me more impetus to ‘journal’, getting in touch with myself on a deeper level.”
Then I ‘suggested’ she tap into her Higher self and let that energy fuel the new blogging.
So today I, Black Jack, do hereby turn over Mom’s care and ‘feeding’ to Judy…(never fear, I won’t be far away—ever). Now you may say, “Well, Mom IS Judy”, but I’m talking about the “mini-Judy” if you will--the wise, innocent child Judy. Some folks call it their ‘inner child’, I believe.
Have fun, Mom! I’ll be playing right along beside you!!
Mom was so excited to begin that she could hardly sleep that night!

BLACK JACK'S Memoirs

2010-09-26T13:41:00.005-07:00

MEMOIRS OF A DOG’S LIFE
By Black Jack Nelson
May 25, 1991 – August 8, 2010
(7,003 wonderful days with my BEST FRIEND Judy!)

NICKNAMES (I affectionately acquired): “Monkey face”, Jack-o-lantern, Jack-in the-box, Jack-o, Jumpin’ Jack, BJ, Jackpot, Fat Jack (because my daddy Benji’s guardian was named Jack, a ‘rotund’ man) and “Alligator jaws” *see explanation below…
ON PUPPYHOOD: I was such a playful, outgoing puppy—not a care in the world! I even loved everyone early on… When we barely had our eyes open we could get out and romp with one another. I remember there were toys there and shoestrings! There were so many fun things to do I kept really busy, even rolling off the little ledge in all my enthusiasm.
Before we all took that dreaded trip to the vet, I felt “amorous” toward my ‘real’ mom, Sassi (and acted on it) which didn’t seem to go over very well…
Mom says I was passionate about everything—and quite a ‘momma’s boy’, always wanting to be very near my mommy. This made her aerobic and floor exercising extra challenging.
ON PLAYTIME: One of my favorite things ever was digging in dirt when we had a grassy backyard in Nebraska—even when it was muddy. When we moved to Arizona Mom discovered I was reminiscing in the nose level flowerpots! Sadly she was clever enough to put big rocks in them to deter me.
Also when we lived in Nebraska, we loved to go racing, barking to say hello to the neighbor dogs when Mom let us out in our backyard. Our only experience in snow happened there, too. Man, my being so well endowed with such short legs, sure made it pretty tough to do my ‘business’! And that white, cold stuff seemed to cling in snowballs to everything especially my then long beautiful hair.
It was really fun when Mom finally taught me some tricks…in fact, it was so exciting my whole body just quivered awaiting the commands. I could sit, wait really well and find hidden cookies inside just about anything, like boxes, newspapers, bags, jars, etc.
My all time favorite toy became a thread bare monkey who was great for pretend killing, shaking and running around the house with his arms and legs flopping from my mouth. I see Mom just put him on ‘my self’… It is so sweet: she made a sort of ‘memorial’ shelf for both Katie and me on her entertainment center to help her remember us better.
ON WALKING: It was fun when Mom walked us two dogs together. I was always far out in the lead acting as if I were ready to go to the ends of the world. Katie always lagged behind more and more as she got older. Mom always joked that I was too busy to read or sniff out anything but the aromatic headlines of past occurrences along the way, while Katie wanted to read every word of every article. This was compounded by her decreasing eyesight in her later years, which didn’t keep her from going in for the ‘kill’ if I even woofed at something. We were quite a team. And you should have witnessed the “leash dance” Mom had to do if she stopped to chat with a neighbor, since we insisted on going round and round them.
I was always so excited to ‘get there’ I pushed with my hind legs (Mom said it looked pretty funny following me). You see, I always wanted to be first, fastest and go the longest, kind of like my Mom actually! Now, were I to come across a juicy (i.e. stinky) morsel, Mom was hard pressed to be strong enough to get my ‘alligator jaws’ to release it. I know she was always concerned about it not being good for me, but boy, I wanted it!
Eventually I had a difficult time walking so those cherished daily walks dwindled, then had to stop. Finally I lost use of me darn right rear leg almost entirely and the other was very weak—maybe I pushed those two back legs too hard through the years... Then Mom needed to carry me outside and hold me while I did my ‘business’. She even devised a belt to help hold me up so she didn’t have to stoop over. And my inside wandering area had to be even smaller, to include only my beds and dishes because otherwise I would fall and hit my head on the floor repeatedly before I could regain my footing. Finally I could barely hobble from bed to food… We made it work, though, as long as we could.
ON EATING: Which brings me to eating! Even suckling on my ‘real’ mom Sassi before my eyes were open, I once ate too much and got so bloated my people we were concerned. I was so roly poly, I’d roll right off the little step in our play area.
Katie and I both loved to catch popcorn in our mouths as it was tossed to us. I loved food so much that at the end of my life when I had little reaction to much of anything I still perked up at the smell of a can of tuna fish being opened.
Fact is, I loved eating so much I would eat my food and then check everyone else’s food & treats, stealing even from ferocious Katie Lou if I had the chance. Mom finally had to separate us at dinner time when Katie couldn’t see anymore to defend her food bowl.
Eventually though, I couldn’t chew my precious biscuits any more and Mom even had to blend my soft dog food—but it sure tasted just as good lapped up as chewed. When I ended up having trouble even finding my food, I became very messy instead of ‘inhaling’ like I once did.
ON SLEEPING: I remember sleeping on a very high bed in the motor home that we lived in for a number of years. Then I preferred curling up in little round beds that a friend gave us when her dogs outgrew them. Finally they got too high for me to maneuver so that’s when Mom used the two halves of a crate also keeping me corralled a bit. Even those were getting a bit high for me in the end.
Mom used to think my tongue must be too long for my mouth because the tip used to peek out when I slept, even becoming dry! But that didn’t disturb my sweet dreams.
PERSONALITY: Mom always said I wanted to please and I must admit that’s true. Even during the “trying to break the ice” game we all played when we were puppies, I’d give up my spot for others. Some would frown on this as submissive but it sure made life more peaceful.
And what is it with humans, wanting to dress us in funny clothes! The coats and shirts I had to get used to were enough. But I resigned myself to this humiliation, too, since it gave Mom so much pleasure.
Then there was paw painting, usually called finger painting I think! Messy, but oh well, it’s nice for Mom to have those paintings--some composites done with our mothers a very long time ago.
Robyn used to be appalled when she saw that Mom had me wearing the pink harness Sugar I used to wear, but we dogs don’t care if pink is called a ‘girlie’ color or not!
Bathing was never really a joy…even at the end of my life the threat of a bath perked me up.
So I guess my job with my keen hearing and sight was to alert Mom and/or Katie to any strange noises—and I was very good at it. The doorbell was the most fun to sound the alarm to so both Katie and I could go rushing to the door barking our heads off .
Now, there WAS some mischief that I got myself into…I seemed to have more than a penchant for ‘stinky’ things, especially what was called “feminine products”. We used to live in a large Las Vegas home with many occupants and one day I came down the long stairway proudly carrying one such prize. Well for whatever reason that caused a really big fuss and from then on, sadly, all garbage/trash containers were put out of my reach for the rest of my life.
My car sickness plagued Mom in my early years since she loved to drive us to many places. She prized her red convertible and after one long winding uphill climb she couldn’t stop before I hurled breakfast beside her bucket seat, not really reachable for thorough cleanup--ever. Of course I did my best, but… Thank goodness I outgrew this affliction because Mom really had the ‘travel bug’. I’m also really happy I could finally totally relax on drives, too, after I no longer was inundated by all the little and big frightening noises as well as gigantic scary objects out the window. Even when the car would just kick up a pebble, I’d be scrambling for Mom’s lap.
Katie taught me about the “vacuum cleaner game”. She acted like it was a big, fierce monster to be attacked and killed before it ‘got’ us. And maybe that’s what she in fact thought; nevertheless I joined right in. Mom actually had to try to get us out of the room or be sure Katie was sleeping soundly enough before she ran it. Maybe that’s why Mom’s never really gotten back in the habit of using it much…
Men seemed to be my enemies after the puppy stage. I’m not sure why because they never really mistreated me. Perhaps they were just different from Mom. But I was super friendly once they proved themselves to be safe.
Once I nipped at someone! When I was a puppy, someone reached toward me from a car. Well, I didn’t know but what they were going to take me from Mom, so I let them know that would not be allowed. Then when I was losing my sight and hearing the whole world seemed frightening until I adjusted some.
Groomers and other professionals were always in complete control and therefore I never, ever got a bad report on my behavior until my senses waned during my later years. One time the groomer actually broke my leash trying to restrain me. So Mom eventually got to comfort and hold me during all grooming sessions. I even had to have some of it done the last time in Mom’s lap since my legs didn’t want to hold me up any more.
ON HEALTH & HANDSOMENESS: Mom likes telling how she helped with my conception. Only two of us were born to Sassi and Benji. I’m sure glad I got the looks; I hear my sister was ugly. Seems she got the terrier part from daddy, I got the silky from him, the black & white coloring from my mother.
During my younger days, one lower canine tooth protruded from my mouth. Some thought it made me look ferocious, others just silly.
My hearing was always quite, perhaps too, acute. At home, even quiet noises such as the 'click' when the furnace came on made me very nervous. Sometimes I became inconsolable. I’d try to hide on highest point, even shoulders, if they were available, clinging and pushing against the person. I WAS afraid of noises but when I could no longer hear, except possibly for certain pitches, my life became very solitary and quiet, especially after Katie left. I was also only able to see movement & shadows during my later days.
Until my skin began getting flaky and thinning I was always very healthy. Mom had lots of tests done but there was nothing conclusive. She began a diet to figure out if I was allergic to something, but that made me really sick. It didn’t bother me in any way, so we learned to live without my beautiful coat of hair. I ended up with quite a wardrobe of shirts and coats. Our neighbor, who loved both Katie & me, gifted me with 3 Hawaiian shirts. Mom kept trying to find coats that fit my super long body, having to remake some of them. I think Mom liked me best in the red one with the iridescent stripes and a pocket.
Then I’d used my wonderful body so well and so long, it just finally wore out. Even on my last night, the vet told Mom she was surprised that I looked so young at age 19+.
THE FLOOD STORY: Then there was the flood of 1993. Mom rescued all 5 of us dogs from having to tread water and put us all in a large crate. Even though Katie and her mom couldn’t even be in the same room together without fighting, we were all aware and wise enough keep it ‘zipped’. As we waited for the rescue boat into the wee hours of the morning, and all the way to shelter there was rarely a peep out of us. Mom only had to do a reminder tap on the top of the crate those couple of times and we got the message.
ON MOTORHOME LIVING: For a number of years Mom, Katie Lou and I lived and traveled together in a motor home. We even went to Mexico a several times, necessitating legal documents, the red tape for which Mom hated. Those Mexican roads were a challenge for Mom. Once when driving around a curve, the refrigerator door popped open, flinging a cabbage down the aisle toward Katie. That was the first time she’d ever jumped right into Mom’s lap when she was trying to drive. If I could have I’d have laughed out loud!
One time Mom took a 4 day side trip and found a good Mexican vet where several of us were boarded. I was so nervous I couldn’t potty the whole time. When Mom came back and took me in her safe arms, it all let loose—all over her! Once again I had tried…
ON KATIE LOU: Katie Lou, my Lhasa Apso 'cousin' was born just a couple of weeks before I was. We lived together nearly her entire life, almost 16 years.
Even after Mom was able to find homes for all the other puppies when we were born, deciding to keep Katie and me for herself, she hesitated to discipline effectively because I was quite timid and fearful, showing signs of cowering over the slightest raised voice—this wasn’t good...
Katie Lou would play with me early on, but more of the time, she was bullying me and causing my life to be a bit like hell. Mom always said I most certainly deserved better and I’m so pleased I had those 3+ years of peaceful ‘alone time’ with just Mom!
Once when we were visiting a friend Mom let herself be talked into trying a shock collar on Katie Lou because she didn’t like her barking at his neighbors. I believe Katie may have lost a little of her mind at that time. Later in the evening, when she was on Mom’s lap, she growled at ME and even tried to nip Mom!
THE DETAILS in a NUTSHELL: In 1990 and 1991 Mom attempted to purchase a Kennel in Cottonwood, AZ. It was badly misrepresented, including the line of Lhasa Apsos that were a part of the purchase. She would learn later they not only had physical/neurological problems, but also tended toward aggression.
Then the Kennel purchase fell through and Mom had ‘rescued’ all the remaining puppies and their breeder parents—in total about 10 dogs. There was no time for obedience training and so we pretty much trained her! On our mini-ranch five of us dogs were allowed to sleep on Mom’s bed at night and she would simply separate them (never me) when a fight broke out.
Mom had used my parents to breed a puppy for a client. My mom, Sassi, was a purebred Lhasa Apso, dad, Benji, a Silky mix. The intended ‘guardian’ for this puppy wasn't able to take him after all, for which Mom and I are both grateful! I was a Lhasa Apso mix, born 5/25/91, and lived with my Mom my entire 19.3 years. Always weighing about 15 lbs. (because Mom always monitored my eating), my height was about 12" at the shoulder; my black body had some white markings (‘tuxedo shirt’ chest and very tips of my toes) and brown eyes. Mom kept my luscious (if I may say so myself), manageable, silky hair an inch or so long just for convenience, because she had to care for so many dogs. Eventually as it thinned I had to be kept covered for warmth and protection from the sun when I was outside. I felt like my duties were to be Mom’s companion, alerting her and/or Katie to any strange noises, then when Katie passed I was her only companion and we could simply ‘be’ gently together. My favorite activities or hobbies were LOVING my daily walks, my ‘pet’ monkey, eating and eventually some training, i.e. sit, wait, etc. which I was so excited to do!
I always lived indoors, sleeping with Mom or where I wanted to in our home in our small community subdivision. I ended up mostly in either my daytime or nighttime bed beside Mom’s. At the very end I needed and wanted to be more confined because I was disoriented from lack of sight/hearing and would wander getting lost even stuck under or behind furniture—that was awful and scary. So I then slept almost all of the time in one of my two beds in the kitchen area Mom enclosed for me, close to my food.
All in all THAT WAS A FULL, HAPPY LIFE!!

VISIT from Black Jack!

2010-09-14T16:00:00.001-07:00

9/14/10 Today the butterflies are orange and plentiful!!
Yesterday my boy came for a lengthy visit! I had been trying to mask the discouragement that he had sent butterflies and a heart shaped cloud as messengers and nothing from him. And I felt further discouragement when Day said she hadn’t heard from him either. Since he always loved the energy generated during my wonderful massages from Day’s healing hands, however, it is no wonder that in the middle of my massage she had to stop and focus on him. She said he had been listening to our conversation and agreeing with what we were saying—that his life was complete, that were he to have left sooner I might not have taken the time to just focus on Judy (reminding me that he chose to stay to get as much time as he could with me), that he’d really been absent from his body for a long time and so I was not to be upset that I wasn’t experiencing more grief. He was by her right side and then left nearest my head sending warmth and energy that both of us could feel. Day was impressed with how he was flitting about since she’d really never known him in his younger days. It told her that he as one of the “busiest” little beings I’d ever met…which she said makes sense as he described how busy he now is in his new life.
Jack made sure as she had been massaging my feet she looked up where I had arranged ‘his shelf’ on my entertainment center. It makes me feel good that he’s proud of my efforts on his behalf.
Black Jack has a new companion—still the black and white Shih Tzu-looking fella that had visited him while he was still here. We suspect that he may be a ‘soul companion’ from a past life, as I don’t recall him befriending anyone who meets that description in this lifetime. His new buddy is teaching him how he will take on a very important responsibility. He said he didn’t want to go into details more until he learns more, but it has something to do with newborns. Day and I told him he’s perfect for that—to infuse them with his infinite patience and caring ways. We had to reinforce this since he is so humble it was hard for him to accept the compliment.
When Day asked Jack about the yellow butterflies (that Day says she’s never seen in Arizona) he said, “yes, those were my friends.” And the heart-shaped cloud… ”well, I had a little help with that!” So today I must assume that the even more brilliant golden butterflies that demanded my attention again today were still more of his joyful friends, romping in green fields of flowers and blue skies. It was so fun to watch them flitter about together!
Day indicated that the angel who has loved him so much from the beginning of his transition stayed with him until he was ready to reach out and join in the activities on the other side. As in life, he sort of stayed back and observed as if he were a bit uncertain, even though he knew all those around him already. Perhaps he had been so used to just being with me…just being with me—mostly in the background but always there and usually in the same room. So he wanted to be sure I know that while he doesn’t announce his presence like Katie Lou did he visits often just to enjoy ‘hanging out’ with me as before. Now I can be more aware and appreciative of those ‘heart feelings’ that I’ve had all along, knowing it’s actually my boy still communicating his love and support to me.
Day was just in awe that he was so vibrant and could take the time out of his busy schedule in his new life of learning to join us for so long. Finally his pal nudged him that they had to go now…
Was the massage or the message more powerful…?

Since Black Jack's been gone...

2010-09-09T17:01:00.002-07:00

Gone for one month… "Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you." ~ Nathaniel Hawthorne” Sounds like Black Jack ‘speaking’…?
Since his departure: many, many sometimes mixed and confusing feelings and thoughts… I’m finding myself in a very unfamiliar space. Although I’ve experienced ‘voids’ before it was never quite like this. At one point as I was missing Black Jack desperately I realized that was focusing outside myself just as has been my tendency perhaps in order to hide from myself. So I asked myself, what would no longer hiding behind dogs, family, significant others, etc. look like? Wouldn’t it look more like living precisely as our dogs DO live—self-focused, no worries, always being completely present in the moment? And how would that translate into the ‘real’ world? I sensed a calm, serene strength… With no worries, the river of Good would automatically flow more smoothly—would gently guide me along. What does it really take to jump aboard that boat?
I’ve been accused of “Pollyanna-ish-ness” all my life and it’s time to realize this is a part of the masterpiece that I Am—I’m actually proud of it! It’s really not a bad way to live. There’s no need to strive to accomplish great things but rather to become the very best ME I can be, naiveté included.
Then today, on the day my boy has been gone for a whole month, while I miss him dreadfully one moment, it also feels somehow as if he was never here. That is heartbreaking on one hand and I know it must mean something on the other.
It’s really difficult to put into words all the unusual feelings and emotions that being responsible for only myself for the first time in life is evoking. So I’m “sitting back quietly” letting it all be okay, knowing Life “alights upon me”… Without Black Jack’s physical body to constantly focus on and care for, it seems much easier to hear his communications now…
Thank you my dear, dear boy!!

Sign from BLACK JACK...?

2010-08-28T17:43:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, feeling a bit lonely I had the sensation, looking down at my feet, that another dog would be good company. Then I realized I’m not ready and it’s not all about being unable to bear the thought of care giving again yet. Rather it’s as much...that no dog could ever give as much as Black Jack did..., and in his own very special unique way. I want and need to bask in that gift for a while longer.
Then three sunflower colored butterflies kept me company as I hung and took down the laundry today...

NATIVE AMERICAN PRAYER

2010-08-25T16:03:00.002-07:00

From our dear friend Kat:

NATIVE AMERICAN PRAYER
I give you this one thought to keep--
I am with you still - I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on the snow,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not think of me as gone--
I am with you still--in each new dawn.

JUDY'S UPDATE ON THE 'SINGLE' LIFE!

2010-08-25T15:28:00.002-07:00

I've been very busy (maybe too busy) since Jack left. I spent about 5 days visiting Robyn & Jim, then a day shopping in Prescott with a friend, another afternoon Sedona with another friend for a very long lunch and finally got to Sedona for the movie "Eat, Pray, Love" (the lessons of which seemed all for ME!). I also rearranged my office area as suggested by Day, my spiritual communicator, and have been finding places for some 'hand me down' home décor that I brought back me from Jim's—he’s condensing with Robyn and renting his home. I suppose this would called busyness, but sure is fun!
I also finally got Black Jack's ashes home where they belong. I was perturbed at first that they came in a white TIN box with black paw prints on it, until I realized that works better with his personality than the stately wooden box Katie's ashes are in. Now I’m 'perfecting' their special [separate] shelves on my entertainment center. I haven't 'heard' from Black Jack yet but I rather expected that I might not since I feel we had been complete for a very long time. His essence is a part of mine now and I know that on a deep level. It occurred to me that he filled me with so much love there was and is nothing lacking. I miss him of course, but I also know we're BOTH much better off--ESPECIALLY him!
SO I’ve not taken much time yet to just be alone. Instead I’m rather enjoying the 'flying' part for now I guess (like he is…)—consciously being open to what new experience, adventure, life awaits.

BLACK JACK's STORY still CONTINUES...

2010-08-13T10:53:00.002-07:00

Five days later... There are seconds from time to time that I go to the past and the sad way Black Jack’s living & leaving looked to me, but I KNOW that his love is here and so I can immediately come back to the present JOY we both have the opportunity to bask in now. His little body contained SUCH a huge loving soul that now he's free of the heavy body we can all realize this even more.
My two friends who read spirit energy reinforced that so beautifully again today with their unsolicited messages from my boy!! I’m SO grateful.
Day told me she senses Black Jack's presence being with me a lot. The feeling is that he, like I, at this time is redefining his life, learning to enjoy other friendships and activities. His angel who loved him too much to go, left him to his fun immediately after she saw me on 8/9.
Kat wrote…Thank you so much for sharing with me all of the writings and how things went [with Black Jack]...I am so glad you feel free to be Judy, however that plays out for you. Black Jack is most ecstatically happy (still!) to be free, and your timing was just perfect. He is at peace, he feels free as a soul again, not trapped as he was in his body, and he is showing me that he is surrounding you with energy like a spiderweb – a 3-D spiderweb, of Love and Joy energy to brighten your days and give your heart comfort and ease. He is not sad at all – he is joyous, and wants that for you too, and [is] PERFECTLY OKAY with you feeling that way! The Love Lives On, my dear, as we know.
Black Jack is an amazing soul – thank you for the pleasure and honor of knowing him and working with him and you over the years.

BLACK JACK'S story continues...

2010-08-12T15:49:00.002-07:00

THE REST OF THE STORY…
Jack & Judy’s journey
There is so very much that has come to light with Black Jack’s passing. I share our experience with the sincere hope that it might provide some nugget of Truth for you, too. Although not everyone is blessed to bond so long and so closely with their pet as I was allowed, I believe the same messages are offered by them to us all.
The transition of my loving companion has become a euphoric experience, but the journey wasn’t all ‘roses’…
I feared that my poor boy was staying even though struggling in his decrepit body because he might be sensing that I feared the unknown of re-inventing myself once he was no longer my entire focus. All my life has been centered on being of service to others never truly knowing Judy.
My fears were calmed enough to consider giving Jack his freedom by Robyn’s suggesting the next steps for my life be taken slowly, ‘one bite at time’.
On Sunday, August 8, following my contacting both Day and Kat, pet communicators, for their input and support, Kat shared that when the heavy energy around her care giving with her elderly dog lifted, she was able to move forward more clearly. It’s wonderful to have such wise counsel and one never knows from where it will come…
Also loving Jack, Kat immediately did the intuitive reading I’ve shared (Jack’s final words of wisdom and wishes) but Day didn’t get my email. However she called to come by for another, unrelated issue. Before she arrived she was being given messages from Jack that it was time. Both of my pet communicators had repeatedly told me that my boy would choose his departure time. I took their messages literally; they were able to show me he was indeed choosing by my coming to the conclusion he needed assistance to go now. Both of us were desperately trying to please the other—me thinking he wanted to stay, him waiting for me to be ready to let him go. So he did choose…
After a 3 hour drive, Robyn arrived the same evening and in telephoning answering services for the hours of veterinarians in the area, were led to a very caring doctor who was available 24 hours. It all seemed so fast that my head was swimming. But nothing would have changed, were his passing to be delayed another 12 hours—we simply would have both had one more difficult night.
So Black Jack demanded one more huge bowl of his food/soup. We read the prayers that Kat shared with us. I had his blue blanket in mind to take with us, but didn’t find it anywhere until the next day so I chose another one. On the drive to the vet’s office Black Jack was totally relaxed on my lap. It was such a ‘warm and fuzzy hug’ I wanted it to go on forever. But then Day returned a call I’d made earlier to her. While we were talking Black Jack indicated that he wanted her to get off the phone quickly so he could also finish enjoying his relaxing in my lap.
Black Jack knew exactly where and why we were there. He became agitated in my arms, even crying out and throwing his head back. I wondered if he were afraid, doing all I could to comfort him—but not enough. Just as the injection was being given he once again threw his head back which caused me more devastating concern! Robyn was there and reassured me that his eyes were peaceful as he left, so I was somewhat comforted. When it was all done he gently sighed…
August 9 was a day of grieving, doubting, missing him, reminiscing with laughter watching videos of him young and happy. What great therapy—now I can remember him this way and let go of the last sad several years. I’m so glad Robyn shared it with me.
Day was scheduled to visit again. And once more Black Jack sent her with messages so I could completely rid myself of any negativity around his transition. First, his agitation was his attempting to leave his body before I had to watch him receive the injection. The whole time his angel never left his side—even as he was throwing his head back that final time saying “I’m SO ready, take me!”. And if this were not the case, any pain, struggle, discomfort endured on this side is totally overshadowed by the exquisiteness that greets them.
The next confirmation was the gorgeous sunrise the next day.
August 10 was exhilarating because all I ever wanted was for my boy to be happy.
I’ve not had a visit yet, but rather feel him with me all the time as we simultaneously process our new joy, supporting one another. A few times I imagine hearing his quiet sounds in the night but instantly realize… When I begin to feel sorry for myself, I remember all these things, and of course that I got to care for him so very many years. The sadness is mixed with the freeing feeling that I no longer “belong” to anyone. This feels almost malleable like clay that I now get to mold into whatever I choose.
Yesterday and today I’m coming down to earth but feeling and determined to pay attention to my best Black Jack guidance! It seems quite strange to have choices that don’t revolve around anyone but myself—I’m managing to cope so far… Quite frankly it feels rather good to answer to just Judy for the first time in my life.

BLACK JACK from the 'other side'...

2010-08-10T19:45:00.001-07:00

August 8, 2010, was numerologically a 10 day, about completion and release (one--new beginnings, zero--hidden meanings). This is the day Black Jack was assisted to leave his aging body behind so his spirit could fly free again. It has indeed proven to live up to its symbolism.
Yesterday, August 9, he conveyed to me through Day that he is ‘eating up’ the magnificence on the other side. He was very busy visiting with everyone, taking in all the love. Any pain or fear that he might have been experienced while in his body is completely irrelevant, minute compared to the awe surrounding him.
When he finally takes time to realize he’d better stop by to check up on Mom, I’m told he will be delivering all the love he was unable to physically show in the last few years of his decline.
The angel that was with him before and during his release just won’t leave him yet because she simply loves him too much. Day says she has never seen this happen before. Didn’t we all know he was special?
His lifelong companion, Katie Lou, and he really never bonded in this lifetime so understandably he has said hi to her but they aren’t hanging out together. In fact, the dog pal who visited Black Jack when he was still here is with him. He (or I prefer to think of this new friend as a she..) is white with black markings. I can only think that he must have been smitten with one of the puppies that was born around the time he was.
As for me and new beginnings, everything looks and feels gloriously new to me, too. I’m feeling Black Jack’s presence almost all the time as the partner he was when he was here, but in a deeper more profound way. It’s as if we are both embarking on exciting new adventures separately but together and buoyed up by what we’ve shared and learned from one another.
And hidden meanings…well, I’ll write lots more about that in later reports—all sort of mind boggling. There are no words to express the gratitude I’m feeling for having been blessed with the presence of such a ‘spiritual advisor’ for so many years. I thought to myself today, should I grow tired of the aloneness, I would be doing myself a disservice by not welcoming another wise animal into my life.

BLACK JACK on Final days...

2010-08-08T08:50:00.002-07:00

I am tired, very very tired...it is frustrating to not be able to run
freely, to move easily, to Be as I was for so very long--active, athletic,
energetic...I have used this body
for a very long time, and it has served me well. It is tired and worn out, that
I know. And so . . .
...Mom is about to have to make a heart felt choice for her precious baby boy--together going into our 20th year.

Black Jack on GROOMING DAY!

2010-07-28T10:05:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was grooming day again! Now, last time Day was here Mom had her ask me what I wanted her to do about my being groomed by Carla. I told them in no uncertain terms I really don’t like it; that I’d prefer they let hair, nails and all just grow. That I have more serious problems to think about than long hair or even long toenails. Well, neither of them thought that was a good idea, so I thought about it and responded as males will, “Awww, just let ‘em do whatever they want!”
Carla had also been thinking about a solution to my wobbly legs not holding me up when she is grooming which makes the rest of my body flop around on the table and gives me a headache from banging it around—no wonder I don’t like it, eh?! Together she and Mom came up with a solution.
Mom held me in her arms while Carla worked on me. The decided I didn’t need to be done perfectly, just maintained for my health and comfort so it was a shorter session, too. I still didn’t like it but I sure didn’t bump my poor head once! Maybe I can tolerate it this way the rest of the times I have left.
When we got home I forgot all about it again and snoozed…

BLACK JACK reports!

2010-07-14T16:30:00.003-07:00

Day visited me again yesterday and sent me her soothing, loving energy. I really love that and today she was allowed to actually surround me with the most beautiful, peaceful pure love white light--what bliss that was! Usually she has just been able to describe it for me, but I sure hope she is allowed to share it with me lots more now. It feels so comforting that maybe I'll decide to stay there one of these days. It feels as if it is unconditional love coming from spirits just waiting to enfold me. Might not be a bad place to be... Otherwise I'm gonna just let my poor body give out because this side doesn't seem too bad, either--I'm still in no pain and rest comfortably most of the time. We had a brief discussion about how Mom and I share some of the same qualities… There's a part of me that knows Mom has a hard time with it sometimes, but it's really "no nevermind" to me (since we animals don't suffer from guilt and other useless human emotions)--and a small matter in the bigger scheme of things. Besides, all is in the right and perfect order just as it is. My mind sure is getting dimmer and dimmer, too. Lots of the time I sense my guides nearby so I never feel alone, but I think they are not bothering me too much because they know I'm so determined to stay at this time, so when it's time for me to go, their impact will be more meaningful to me. I kept showing Day a white dog with a tri-colored calico face, about the same size and look that I used to be. To Mom and Robyn it's a mystery as to 'anyone' in our past who could match that description. I know, though, it's a new playmate waiting for me on the other side. One day I'll go romp and play with her...maybe even "go make babies" (since I was such a 'stud' when I still had my manhood)!! Day says Katie is going to share one of her angels with me when I cross over, too, so she told Mom I'd have three angels instead of just two like she had. How beautiful it all is...that white/silver/gold shimmering light of the angels.

More inspiration from Black Jack!

2010-07-09T12:21:00.002-07:00

Wow! Kat just shared some real compliments for me with Mom! Earlier she had told Mom I’m hanging in there because I enjoy being a sort of inspiration to her and that she’ll have to decide how I do that.
Mom responded, “I've known for a long time that he has been the root of MANY of my creative activities. So maybe there is something more I'm to be doing... I'll tell you one thing he has a HUGE following in Facebook/blogs/emails--and I believe he has been an inspiration to many, not just me. I just hope he knows that even when he's gone the 'work' he helped me begin won't end!”
Kat admitted “they’re all inspirations to us in some way, I think. But definitely Black Jack helps you with the creative aspect – he shows me him being like a party planner, coordinating the details of what’s to come, whatever “event” is happening next (whether that’s you doing an etching, or a drawing, or planting a flower, or whatever). It is really hard to describe this, because it’s very multi-layered/nuanced, but he in some manner holds and/or works with energy around you so that you are feeling your best creative self when you start the project, whatever it is. He is just so much bigger than his little body, but he is very subtle and quiet about it.
I have not doubt he’s got a HUGE following, he’s simply an inspiration (perhaps at least partly because he IS so much bigger than his frail/declining body) and absolutely ADORABLE.”
Boy do I love being called ADORABLE because sometimes I don’t think Mom can always see that as she cleans up after my failing body. I’m so GLAD the “partying” will continue!!

Special report from BLACK JACK!

2010-06-09T14:31:00.001-07:00

6/9/10 I wanted to report that I made sure Day told Mom I did not want to go to Flagstaff with her on Tuesday. Although I never have made that trip with her I needed to be sure I was at home that day. I was happy that Susan came to visit--still love those belly rubs!
Truth is, I have been realizing that his old body just isn't serving me--lots of things just don't seem to work any more. So I thought maybe Tuesday would be a good day to leave the body behind. So I went to sleep more soundly than usual a couple of times during the day. When Mom awakened me upon her return, I was as limp as a rag which disturbed her just a tad. But I've reconsidered and dug into my food that evening, eating almost my usual full can of yummy dog food--then slept again like a baby last night (after the usual preliminary restlessness).
Sorry to say I'm having more accidents that Mom has to clean up and seems I require more help. I sure do appreciate all the special care & attention, but I do keep telling Mom not to worry so much about me!
I've worked through any trepidation I had about leaving, in fact one of my 'Guides' tried to reassure me that I could be with Mom even on the 'other side' but I figure why would I do that when I'm so comfortable being on THIS side! I also know that Mom will be okay, I simply want to 'hang' a bit longer. So I'll go when I'm sure I'm ready, or maybe when my body just wears out completely... I send my love to you my dear friends.

Request for BLACK JACK!

2010-06-01T12:15:00.003-07:00

Last night my beloved ‘boy’ Black Jack had another restless night…crying out often in the dark. I could share all the things I tried to make him comfortable, but nothing seemed to really help. Since he’s healthy and not in any pain that I can ascertain, it appears to me that he simply is fighting to stay with “Mom” and not leave his physical body.
So today I’m requesting your help by using your method of choice to communicate with a higher intelligence (from prayer to affirmations) for Black Jack. Please ask that he realize it’s time to very gently leave his feeble body behind in favor of the next experience his soul deserves. Since we are all One and love our animals so much, I know this will help. Thank you.

2010-05-26T11:22:00.002-07:00

PART 10 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK/Health & Comfort
Kat's NOTES: Black Jack is a delightful, sweet soul, Judy. It was truly a pleasure to connect with him for you in this way. He conveys a sweetness of Love and appreciation for you, and wants you to know that he does not in any way feel he is “suffering” at this time, even though he has slowed down and does have some stiffness/soreness especially in the back end.
SUGGESTIONS:
1. Bach essence for restlessness: Agrimony; Bach for indecision, imbalance: Scleranthus. 2 drops of each in a 1 oz bottle of filtered water, shake well to blend, then give him 4 drops of this 4 or more times a day, with at least one dose before bedtime. Can give as many doses as needed throughout the day/evening, no harm is caused by numerous doses. These are vibrational essences, they work on the mental/emotional states.
2. Blue for calming – place something blue (fabric, towel, etc.) near where he likes to lay.
3. NuVet Plus for his soreness/stiffness and for general health – see http://www.katberard.com/res_supplements_nuvet.htm for information and how to order. I recommend the powder, as it’s easier to dose and you don’t have to worry about whether he’d like the wafers or not. It’s also a great antioxidant formula, which is good for everything!
Please note that I am not a veterinarian. The information provided herein is not to be construed as veterinary or medical advice. It is offered simply for your consideration. Consult with your veterinarian and trust your intuition as to what feels appropriate for Black Jack.
Thank you for asking me to talk with Black Jack, Judy. I look forward to talking with you about the session.
Many blessings and hugs and Love to you and Black Jack,
Kat
Kathleen A. Berard
Animal Communicator, Bach Flower/Wild Earth Animal Essences Practitioner
and Holistic Animal Care Consultant
Intuitive/Spiritual Guidance for People
KATALYST FOR ANIMAL WHOLENESS, INC.
San Antonio, Texas 78247
210-402-1220
kat@katberard.com
www.katberard.com

PART 9 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK-SPECIAL MESSAGE FOR JUDY

2010-05-26T11:17:00.002-07:00

*Kat What else do you want to say to Judy, or want her to know?
**Black Jack That I Love her very very much, and we are never far apart, even though we are in separate bodies. We have a bond, a closeness, of the [soul] that is very special, and we are together for always. Please let her know that. When I am gone from my Black Jack body, I want her to remember this. That I am not far away, I am Right Here, just as I am now. I will be with her in her heart, for always, I know this. I want her to know that she will always be in my [soul-heart] as well.
** Tell her thank you, very very much, for all of the good things she has done for me over our time together, and please ask her to know that I am very happy with how our lives together have gone. I know there were times, and still are times, that she worries about me; but ask her not to do that so much, and to just enjoy being “in the moment” with me. It’s okay if she wants to sleep more, like I do; she could use more sleep! [Black Jack conveys that he thinks sometimes you do not allow yourself to rest as much as you could/should, so he is saying to take naps if that would be helpful to you, like he does.]
*I’ll tell Judy, thank you.
*Is there anything else you would like to talk about before we close, Black Jack?
** No, I feel okay with what we have done today, Kat. Tell Judy not to worry, to be happy, to enjoy life in every moment, and to be as Big as she can possibly BE!! It’s good when Judy is Big, she has her energy about her and feels very centered at those times. Ask her to seek that [space/place/energy] every day, in every moment, and to let nothing pull her out of her center. She is a strong human, and she is very deserving of all good things, Kat. There are more good things coming her way, tell her that. She should not worry, all is well.
*I will do that, I know she’ll be happy to hear that, Black Jack.
*Thank you very much for talking with me today. It has been a pleasure connecting with you, and I wish you all the very best now and in the future on your Journey, Black Jack. Take good care of yourself, and enjoy every moment.
*Blessings to you, sweet Black Jack.
** Thank you, Kat! And blessings to you. [he sends me a big wave of Love and appreciation for you, Judy, that reminds of a star streaking across the sky but trailing a rainbow of beautiful colors in its wake. Just lovely; very sweet and comforting energy from Black Jack to you/for you.]
*Thanks, Black Jack, I’ll convey that energy to Judy.
*Take care, Black Jack.
** Bye, Kat!

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY, BLACK JACK!

2010-05-25T10:38:00.002-07:00

So far Black Jack is choosing his second favorite pastime [since he is now enjoying his very golden years] to celebrate his birthday--soundly sleeping. Here is his second--eating, which has always been a special moment in all the days of his life. Lately he has taken to falling asleep with his face in his food dish! Here the after effects!

The latest in the Black Jack saga...

2010-05-17T10:38:00.003-07:00

New 'wrinkle' in care giving for 'ancient' dogs...
Finally having gotten a working arrangement for both of us to get some sleep I got quite a start the other night. After last call, Black Jack settles in (usually) to his comfy bed away from Mom's room because he tosses so much during the night. This bed is 1/2 a good size dog crate with the entrance blocked. For a long while he has been unable to get out of it on his own so I had no worries. As has become the habit I awoke around 2 a.m. to take him out for his mid-night relief--I really hate wet beds and I'll bet he does, too. Well HE WASN'T THERE! In my half-awake state that was pretty startling. THEN I wondered where in the entire house he might have gotten himself trapped--under a bed or behind what furniture, like he used to do when still allowed to wander. Finally I found him. He had somehow gotten back to the utility room corner to do his 'business' (both) then ended up wedged under a chair that has a bar just the right height to hang his head over. Sad sight, but he was sound asleep in this position.
Attributing human reasoning to him, he must have just wanted to avoid his discomfort and my dismay in having to change and wash his bedding again--LOL!

$$Deposit info for May!

2010-05-08T12:33:00.002-07:00

HAPPY MOTHERS’ DAY!!!

I TRUST THAT YOU’RE CREATING YOUR OWN HUGE ‘DEPOSITS’ IN THIS WONDERFUL AND PROSPEROUS 2010!!!!!!!!!

Recently I mentioned to a friend that I’m not sure what’s next in my life after my beloved 19 year old dog decides to leave his body. He suggested the book by Lynn Grabhorn, Excuse Me, Your LIFE Is Waiting.

Well, I had decided NO MORE ‘self help’ books but because he’s such a like-minded friend I checked it out online. Looked good, so I ordered one, then another (that I’ve already given to a friend).

It’s based on the LAW OF ATTRACTION of which Abraham long ago made us aware. While those readings through the Hicks family seemed logical and simple to me even then, they felt just too vast for me to become a serious student.

Well, Lynn, in her humorous and down to earth style has blended them with her own life experiences into this palatable (even enjoyable) book.

She claims (and I think we’d all agree) this simple ‘key’ is the “greatest missing link [from all the other ‘self-help’ literature out there] to life and living ever known to mankind!”

How could I NOT share with you all?!

Today I just happened to be reading about how we really CAN help turn the economy and world situation around—which of course includes our individual financial circumstances as well!!

Here’s part of what she writes (paraphrased in part)…

I absolutely know you’ve noticed like I have, that in bad times all we seem to hear, everywhere we go, is how bad, bad, bad things are. Even in good times we humans tend to enjoy complaining, don’t we—prices too high, corporations too greedy, government incompetent, etc.? EVERY NEGATIVE WORD OUT OF OUR MOUTHS IS “MAKING IT BIGGER, STRONGER, AND MORE DANGEROUS THAN IT WAS BEFORE [WE] STARTED BAD-MOUTHING IT”!

We may feel we had nothing to do with the condition it appears the world is in right now, but THAT’S NOT TRUE. Each of us is a part of the mass consciousness flow—everything we think and feel has had and continues to have a monumental impact whether we believe it or not.

As difficult as it may seem we MUST ‘flow some Feel Good energy’ to the situation—simply seeing things as we know they are meant to be.

This very simple key works 100% of the time whether for: The economy,

Global conflicts & gang wars,

Moral issues,

Mass killings,

AND our own financial situation,

As well as all else ‘bad’ personal or world wide that appears to be true!

Of course I highly recommend this book if it ‘speaks’ to you.

From The Quartus Report, Charlene Bradshaw (whose husband served in the military, willing to give his life for our freedom) reinforces this formula (again paraphrased in part)…

She says, “Our role in all of this from the human standpoint is nothing…until disagreements are resolved within the consciousness that created them, each situation will continue toward its just end or until there is the spiritual awakening of the collective mind.”

“While all this ‘drama’ continues”, she goes on, “we are not to pray for good to overcome evil, as this thought places us in the framework of duality. We are to rise above duality, come together in mind and heart with one another…go within and up to that highest frequency in consciousness, release the Light, Love and Energy...” and see only what we know CAN be.

TIME TO TURN THINGS AROUND in 2010—

simply by FEELING GOOD!!!!!!!!!

I’m also still having a blast ‘cheer leading’ and enjoying our now very large group of pet lovers on Facebook (search for judysjrny@gmail.com and I’ll gladly be your friend!). If you’re on you can join in the fun AND good resources/work at the group (search for) PET LOVERS.

Black Jack on Mom's SLEEPING solutions!

2010-04-29T07:47:00.001-07:00

I'm thinking my days of sleeping in Mom's bedroom may be OVER. I remember a very long time ago that I was able to jump up on the bed and make myself at home (along side Katie Lou). Because she feared I'd try to jump down and seriously hurt myself, Mom began making me sleep in my bed beside hers. Then when I kept getting lost wandering the house in my darkness, she 'closed' my bed so I'd stay there. Sometimes I long for those freedoms, but in the bigger picture I know it's for the best. I’m less confused and I love that it helps Mom have a less stressful life.

And now if I can manage to pee near bedtime for Mom, she sleeps more soundly. However she is so very vigilant that she has been awakening at my every move in order to be there for me should I struggle to change positions or need to relieve myself again during the night. Recently, due to lack of sleep for so long, continuing to maintain her health has been in question--along with her sanity. I've tried to tell her in many ways not to worry or fuss so much over me. If I fall I can usually get up myself even if it takes some effort.

So I'm pleased to report that night before last, seeing this night headed in the same direction, she put me in my 'kitchen bed' so she wouldn't hear me toss and turn. It worked--then when Mom gets up at about 1:30 for her own ‘potty break’, she gets me up and I’m ready to go again, too. Then we can both go back to sleep soundly again until morning—nice we’re so ‘bonded’ that we’re on the same schedule, isn’t it? Not sure I like being awakened from a very sound sleep but the timing is perfect. This could be the perfect solution for this phase of our life together since the same routine worked perfectly last night, too.

PART 8 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK-MORE ON JUDY

2010-04-29T06:26:00.004-07:00

*Okay, that’s a great idea, Black Jack. I’ll let her know. What other things do you want Judy to know?

** That she should not stop doing what she Loves to do, no matter what. To always keep expressing her creativity, her energy, her Love for all things, through her work. Because her Work is really Who She Is. She is a bright Light, Kat, and she needs to know that. She is a Light for many many many humans, and she should please keep doing what brings her the pleasure in her heart and mind and soul for the beauty that she shares with the world. It is not enough to simply do it, it is important to keep sharing it with others, because it [evokes] many things in many humans, seeing a beautiful expression of Love the way Judy does her Work.

** And remind her, that as a big bright Light, she is “bigger” than the day-to-day worries of being human. Ask her to always stand in her [soul]-Light, to always come from that place in her Self in all she does, whether that is how she takes care of her Self, or how she shares her Self with others, or how she helps others, or how she engages with the world. Always from the [soul]-Light. She is a very bright Light, Kat, and I do not want her to make her Self small, in any way, ever. She has worked very hard to come to the place of expression of Who She Is, in a big way, and I want to ask her not to let go of that, for any reason, for any person or way of thinking or way of being or place of living.

** Let other Lights come to her, and engage with her, as much as she seeks out the Lights to engage with. There are many on Earth who are doing this, Kat, and she is in good company. Tell her not to worry, there are more coming her way, there will be many more grand adventures to engage in and to enjoy most fully! [Black Jack “smiles” – he has great great Love and appreciation for Who You Are, what you do, how you express your talents, how you share your Love of others with others, and he is very proud of you being Who You Are now, that you do not hide and make yourself small. He wants you to continue to expand that Light, to keep expressing your Self through your Work and to also do Work for your own pleasure, not just for others.]

*I’ll let her know, thank you.

PET PEOPLE

2010-04-21T09:02:00.002-07:00

If you are on Facebook, check out the group PET PEOPLE--where animal lovers share the words of or about their beloved pets--any species!

If you agree it's about time we had a place to come together and share with other pet lovers world-wide, JOIN US.

Seems to me we animal lovers feel something special down deep and we love to talk about it.

www.facebook.com/group.php

PART 7 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK ON JUDY

2010-04-21T08:44:00.001-07:00

Black Jack** Judy’s heart is very big, and very full of Love, for me and for others. Ask her to deepen and strengthen the Love she has for her Self. She has greatly improved that over our time together, but it is important that she allow even more Love and appreciation into her life from others and for her Self. [Black Jack conveys to me that he feels you have greatly advanced over the years in being kinder and gentler with your Self, Judy, and he wants you to continue to expand that and open to it. Not only what you can do for you in that regard, but also opening even further to what others offer you in the way of Love, friendship, appreciation, support, etc.]
Kat* I will convey that to Judy, Black Jack. What else do you want Judy to know?
** That her talents, her gifts, are not just in what she conveys with her hands [he shows me the meticulous work that you do, he is very aware of what you do for others and how much pleasure it gives you to do that], but also what she conveys from her heart. Ask her to let others know what she receives about them and from their animal friends through the Love-work that she does. This is important, humans want to know that others understand the beauty and richness and uniqueness of those they Love. It reflects back to the human that what they feel for their Loves is shared and enjoyed by another, such as Judy, with her talent and ability to engage with others of all kinds [animal and human].
*So for example, you are saying you want her to convey with words [in writing] about what she experiences when she does a piece of work for someone? And also if she does that work for her Self?
** Yes, exactly! That is it. I want her to put her feelings and experiences with her work into words for others to enjoy and appreciate. This allows her to not only have the pleasure of those feelings and experiences, but she also conveys to others the richness and beauty of who a particular [soul, being, spirit] is. This would mean a great deal to those receiving the information. And it would also be helpful if she were to include that information for others to know about as well. [note: he is aware you “talk with many” – i.e. through your newsletter/mailings and website – and is conveying the idea that you (with the human’s permission) share your insights and experience of doing a particular piece of work in a shortened version when you include that piece of work in your newsletter. Perhaps this could also be included on your website, with their permission of course.]

PART 6 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK ON BOREDOM AND CONFUSION

2010-04-21T08:39:00.002-07:00

Judy says, “As I've been observing his behaviors another question comes to mind out of curiosity... When he wanders and/or goes in circles, what does he need from me? I could speculate, but would rather know if there is something he is trying to communicate to me when he does this.” Please tell me what is happening for you or with you or in you when you wander or go in circles, Black Jack. **I am sometimes not so sure where I am, or what I am supposed to be doing, Kat. Sometimes my mind seems to be . . . . [fuzzy, unfocused] . . . and I do not know what to do. Sometimes I am just a bit at a loss for something to do. And sometimes, well, I need something to do that is fun and interesting. [note: he then conveys that sometimes he is trying to get your attention to focus on him so that you will take a break from whatever you are doing, that you need the break at those times. So notice when he does this, as to what you are doing at the time and for how long you’ve been doing it.] *Do you do then when you need to go outside to go to the bathroom? **Yes, sometimes. But mostly she knows when I need to go out, that’s not a problem for us. *Okay. Is there anything else Judy can do to help you at those times? Engage with me at those times, stop what she is doing and focus on me, on us, and what we can do that is fun or interesting or even just spending time together enjoying the touch of hand to body, or head to hand, or whatever. I would like her to be “in the moment” with me at those times, not thinking about whatever she was doing, or still needs to do, but just stopping and being in the moment, really enjoying the time, the minute, the second, the breath we each take over and over again, the feeling of simplicity that our lives are about, the feeling of deep Love and companionship that we share. I know Judy cannot do all the things with me that we used to do, because I am rather slow now in my body. But I still love to be touched and held (as is comfortable) and I love to be [caressed] gently and loving, as she is so good at doing. I really enjoy those quiet moments together, I am happy with the simple things, Kat. I don’t need a lot to be happy. I really [cherish] our simple time together, and how Loving we are with one another.

Black Jack says...

2010-04-07T13:22:00.002-07:00

Monday Day was just here to give Mom another awesome massage and spoke with me as she usually does. They both seemed to get a chuckle out of my saying that yes my guides have reassured me there is nothing to fear going to the other side and that it can be peaceful. When they explained that I can even then still... be with Mom, I simply couldn't understand why I would want to do that when I'm already doing it here! I'm perfectly content, in no pain and understand my limitations, dealing with them accordingly. Only thing I'd feel better about is if Mom would be more content like I am and stop worrying and fussing over me as much as she feels she needs to.

Today with Mom!

2010-03-26T11:50:00.002-07:00

Today after Mom put me outside in the cold, stiff wind, she seemed to think I didn’t need to refuel as soon as I thought I should. So this is how I got the message across—it worked! (Who says we don't communicate with our humans?!)

Spring is here!

2010-03-22T09:58:00.003-07:00

The wearing of my Hawaiian shirts instead of my winter jackets is a sure pronouncement that spring has finally arrived!

PART 5 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK ON COMFORT & MAINTENANCE REQUESTS

2010-03-20T13:53:00.002-07:00

3/20/10 Black Jack: I had a day yesterday that was slower than usual. I was thinking about finally moving on. But decided to bounce back bigger and better than usual. I had Mom even take me for my walk today--and eating, you should see!! So I reminded Mom that it would be a good idea to post the rest of my talk with Kat to remind her what I want her to know--AND to be sure you enjoy my wise words. She respects me so much that here is PART 5 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK ON COMFORT & MAINTENANCE REQUESTS:

*Kat asks: Is there anything more Judy can do to make your final days better?

** Even though moving around is not so easy for me now, I would still like to move around as much as possible. [he conveys to me shorter walks, possibly more often (twice or three times a day for 5-10 minutes); and then being carried around outside; and then in the car, going some place enjoyable, whether to visit friends or an interesting place or a favorite location. He does not want to become housebound if possible.]

*I understand, and I will let her know. What else?

** Can she rub me? [he conveys massaging especially his back legs, rump and low back, but overall would be appreciated, 2-3 times a day for a few minutes. It helps with the stiffness and soreness and maintains good circulation.]

*I’ll certainly let her know that is your wish, Black Jack. What else?

[he sends me the feeling that his food is not as easy for him to chew – I’m not sure what you’re feeding, but if it is kibble, it would help to soak it for 10-15 minutes in water, see if he will eat it that way. If canned, then can’t do much about that. If raw, it should be lightly cooked instead as raw would not sit well with his “older” digestive system. If homecooked, or raw, it should be warmed (room temperature) to make it more palatable. His sense of taste and smell are a bit dulled with age. Don’t make any sudden changes in food, other than soaking kibble if that is what he eats.

I scanned his mouth and it feels like he may have an issue with the molar or tooth in front of it on the upper right side of his mouth. Or the gum may be inflamed; just that there is some issue going on in that area. You might take a look to see if you notice anything; or next time he’s in to the vet, have them check his mouth thoroughly.]

*I’ll let her know that, thank you. What else?

[He conveys that he often feels cool/cold, so he would enjoy being covered whenever he’s sleeping with something lightweight, like a hand towel; and if it is a cool day outside (below 60 degrees F is cool to him), a lightweight coat/sweater would be appreciated.]

*Thank you; what else?

[are his nails long? He shows me his nails and the feeling that they are a bit on the long side, he does not like the feeling that gives him when he walks.]

*Okay, I’ll ask Judy to make sure your nails are kept trimmed. Is there anything else you want her to know, to do for you, to help you feel comfortable?

** No, Kat. Those are many things, and she already does so many things for me, that I do not need to ask for more. She takes very very good care of me, I do not worry that I will be forgotten or not treated very well. Judy Loves me, I know this; and it makes me happy that she takes such good care of me. So tell her not to worry, I am not miserable, or complaining here. Just if she can do these things more often, that would be helpful to me.

*I know she’ll be happy to do whatever she can for you, Black Jack.

Spring with Mom!

2010-03-16T15:03:00.003-07:00

BLACK JACK: Well, Mom enjoyed her walk so much earlier that she found the time to take me for a walk, too. Even though I may not be able to see the blossoming trees, blooming flowers or hear the birds singing about Spring's arrival, I definitely get to feel the warmth of the sun, the Autumn breeze and smell the earth. It felt so good I even did a bit of my 'bunny hop' run. THANKS, Mom!

PART 4 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK ON ACCEPTING EACH MOMENT

2010-03-08T11:35:00.002-07:00

**KAT: So no unfinished business between you two?
***BLACK JACK No, I am just enjoying my time with her, most importantly I am enjoying the Love we feel for each other and show to each other every day. It is very necessary for me to be here for a little while yet, because Judy is getting used to the idea of my not being here in my body some day. She is quite ready but I think her heart is still adjusting a bit. So I am here for a while, I do not want her to have big big grief when I let go of my body. I want her to feel comfort and peace, and to trust and know that I am okay, that she is okay, that it is ALL okay.
Judy has learned about letting go and releasing many things over the time we have spent together in these bodies. She has learned so much, and it’s good learning, very good learning. She has been helpful to many others in them learning to do the same thing, by seeing her as an example of how to keep shifting and moving forward with life. Humans sometimes struggle with change, with adjusting to what is rather than what one wants it to be. That’s okay; they need to do that, to learn to be stronger in themselves, to learn to more graciously accept the change, and to realize that the change is a good thing! It’s always a good thing, there is always benefit to it. Maybe not recognizable at first, but it’s there, it’s in there for them.
Judy doesn’t struggle so much with change now, she is very good about going forward with what is before her. I am very proud of her for this! And she also has gotten very good at taking care of her heart, and her body, and her well-being. This pleases me, greatly, and I know I do not need to help her so much with all of that, she is doing well for her Self in those areas. So please tell her I am happy for her, that she is taking good care of her, as much as she takes good care of me.
** I will do that, Black Jack.

PART 3 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK ON LEARNING NOT TO STRUGGLE

2010-03-02T10:28:00.002-07:00

***Black Jack: I know she is wondering if I will let go soon; tell her I will be here for a while yet, I am not quite ready to let go. I like my body, even if it is a bit tired and not so strong as it used to be. I like being in it, it is a good body. It’s small, it can go places [he shows me going under furniture, under bushes, under your legs when you’re sitting down, etc.], and I’m close to the ground so I can really, really smell the dirt! I like the Earth smell, it’s very strong and rich [he conveys the smell to me, and how different things – plants, trees, bushes, grass, weeds, etc. – each have their own particular smell. He can parcel out each smell from the other, even at his advanced age. He likes the Earth smell, and the smell of nature.]
**I will let her know that, thank you. Is there completion needed between you two so that you can move on out of your body?
***No, not completion; just a sense of enjoyment of these last days, however long they may be, Kat. I don’t have any rush or hurry in me to let go; I am enjoying my time as Black Jack [i.e. in that body] for as long as I am able. I don’t want her to think that she should allow me to dwindle to nothing, for that is not to my style or liking. But it would be okay for me to go on my own when I am ready, or if she thinks it is time to help me because I am struggling or suffering – especially suffering – then I ask that she help me. I don’t want to struggle, I am rather tired much of the time and so it would be a big effort for me to get out of my body on my own, I think. [I then conveyed to him the idea of him slipping from his body during sleep, just letting go if that is to his liking]
[He thinks on that] But, then again! I may just be able to do that, I could go quietly, I see it does not need to be a struggle.
**No, no struggle at all, Black Jack. You can go in your sleep, you can go when you’re awake, you can go whenever you like. It is up to you. And of course, if you need assistance, I think Judy would be okay with helping you with that. I have not talked with her about that, but I will let her know that you are open to that, should you seem to be suffering or struggling to get out of your body. Is that acceptable to you?
***Yes, Kat, of course, very much so. [he conveys that he would like to be able to let go on his own, but definitely if you sense he is struggling or more importantly suffering in his body, he would like the assistance. That is up to you, however, as to whether you feel comfortable with making that decision.]
**I’ll let Judy know.

Living with Mom!

2010-02-27T08:43:00.002-07:00

2/27/10 Good morning, everyone! Mom’s been really busy this week but I finally got her to share my picture and some thoughts. What do you think of my latest fashion statement? Pretty sophisticated looking, eh?! ABOUT this new outfit: My coats and bedding were so nasty yesterday I just had to get Mom to wash them, so she found this sweater to put on me in the meantime. I think it’s sorta manly looking, don’t you? Don’t know if you can see the metallic red threads in it but that touch makes me edge on feeling ‘dressed up’! BUT I never really wore it before for several reasons—first, it was my AUNT, Sootei’s! Second, it’s kinda hard to get on and most of all it always bothered my ‘private parts’. Well age and its gravity apparently have kicked in there, too, since it doesn’t seems to no longer give me any problems.
Now I just have to get Mom to post the rest of the thoughts I shared with Kat…
Oh yes, and Mom's the BEST--she actually pureed my bedtime cookies last night since I have such a tough time chewing!

PART 2 of Intuitive reading--BLACK JACK ON LEARNING FROM ONE ANOTHER

2010-02-23T08:52:00.002-07:00

Kat speaking to BJ:
***"Judy has this message for you: “My beloved Black Jack, please know how precious you are to me and how very much you are a part of me, in my heart forever! I know without any doubt that you have always tried to please me even now when your body doesn’t respond; I recognize and appreciate that more than you know.”
***Kat, please tell Judy I feel the same way about her! I am very, very pleased and grateful that we are friends, that we are good, close, exceptional friends, and that we have mutual respect for one another. I know not all animals are treated with the respect such as I am, and I am [very blessed] to have this human, to have Judy, to be my friend and companion and partner of the heart. She is a very loving, big hearted human, and I am very happy to be here with her!
***I will tell her. She says, “Thank you for choosing to be my loving companion and allowing me to learn from you. My life would not be as rich without having had you in it. My desire now is that you be as comfortable and happy as possible in your final days. Most importantly I want to be sure you know that I want you to move on and be free of your feeble body as soon as you are ready—I will be okay since we’ve had so much respectful loving, learning and growing time together, just the two of us. I’ll be very sad, but I will also feel a blessed freedom for both of us. Your loving human, Judy.”
***I have learned from Judy too! I have learned to be patient, I have learned to have more trust in my Self and in humans, I have learned that it’s okay to not be the strong one all the time, it’s okay to be Me. To be ME! [he “smiles” – he appreciates that you accept and respect him for Who He Is, as much as for how he is]

Part 1-BLACK JACK on APPRECIATION AND CONTENTMENT

2010-02-22T12:56:00.001-07:00

BLACK JACK speaks of APPRECIATION AND CONTENTMENT
Here is the first part in which I speak of APPRECIATION AND CONTENTMENT:
“Good morning, Black Jack. This is Kat the Animal Communicator, talking with you at Judy’s request today.
Judy sends you her Love and great appreciation for Who You Are, and for the many years of wonderful companionship you have brought to her life. You are a Love, Black Jack, and she loves you very much. She has a message and some questions for you, but first, how are you doing today?
**Kat, I’m doing . . . well, pretty okay for Who I Am. [meaning, he’s slowed down, he’s stiff and he doesn’t move as well as he used to, but he’s okay with this. He is enjoying the slowness of the days, the slowness of time passing, and the quietness of his world with you. He conveys to me that he takes quiet pleasure/comfort in the stillness of his world, and great comfort in knowing he can trust you in all things, whether that is his care, or his activities, or anticipating his needs. He is a very very sweet dog/soul, one who has a deep sense of appreciation for the world he lives in, for you, and for Who He Is. He also greatly appreciates his body continuing to “hold him” and he is enjoying his twilight time with you.]
**That’s good to hear, Black Jack. Very good to hear. It feels like you’re doing okay in your quiet world?
**Yes, it is okay to be like this [i.e., he does not hear very well at all, as you noted; he does convey to me, though, that he “senses” sound at times, and he uses his other senses to compensate for the loss of hearing. He conveys, for example, how he feels the wind ruffle his coat and he remembers the sound of wind, so he still enjoys his hearing sense, just on a psychic level, if you will.]
**Okay, thank you. “

2/19/10 INTUITIVE READING with BLACK JACK

2010-02-22T12:46:00.001-07:00

INTUITIVE READING with BLACK JACK:
On Friday, February 19 our long distance friend Kat agreed to use her magnificent gift to do a reading with me for Mom. I'm dividing the resulting reading from our 'conversation' into several postings so it's not too long for one reading. So DO come back to get the 'whole story'!
First she asked ABOUT me (Black Jack):
So I told her: I am a Lhasa Apso mix, born 5/25/91 (almost 19 years old). I have lived with Judy my entire life even during conception. I weigh 12 to 15 lbs., height about 12" at the shoulder, black body with some white markings with the typical brown eyes. Mom keeps my sadly thinning hair short and covered for warmth and protection from the sun when I’m outside. My duties used to be to alert Mom to any movement, sound or stranger, but are now relegated to being Mom’s companion and simply ‘being’ with her.
I live indoors, mostly sleeping in either my daytime or nighttime bed beside Mom’s in our home in a small community subdivision.
I have no companion other than Mom now as Katie Lou passed almost 3 years ago.
I was bred for a client of Mom’s when she had a kennel, I am told my dad Benji was a Silky mix, mother Sassi a full Lhasa Apso. The intended human wasn't able to take me after all, for which I'm grateful! I was a playful puppy--loved to eat, which I still do. At some point in my puppy hood, I seemed to change from playful and outgoing to fearful. I WAS afraid of noises but now I can no longer hear except for certain pitches—so life is now very solitary and quiet since Katie left. I can also see only movement & shadows. Because I now have a difficult time walking my cherished daily walks are dwindling.
Our new friend’s name and information is: Kathleen A. Berard
Animal Communicator, Bach Flower/Wild Earth Animal Essences Practitioner
and Holistic Animal Care Consultant-Intuitive/Spiritual Guidance for People
KATALYST FOR ANIMAL WHOLENESS, INC. www.katberard.com

More days with Mom!

2010-02-07T11:35:00.005-07:00

2/1/10 Sometimes I wander away from my food bowl and get my head stuck in the pillows surrounding my kitchen area. Mom always helps me find my way back so I can finish my food. Lately I've not been getting the hang of 'containing myself' during the day like I can overnight--not sure what's up with that. Initially Mom is peeved, but then remembers that I would never, never do anything to displease her and ends up giving me her loves.

Found yet another sleeping position. For whatever reason I didn’t want to stay in my cozy bed, so chose to wander into the pillows where Mom put the blanket over me. My bottom side was a bit cool, but this was comfortable for a pretty long while.

2/6/20 I actually got a walk during this time, but since I don't have the energy or eyesight to go very far, very long, very straight anymore, they get shorter and shorter. Was thinking that when I see Katie again I'll have to tell her she ought to have stuck around a while longer. Although Mom did her best with Katie's irrationality to make her as happy and comfortable as possible, this individualized 'royal treatment' in my last years has been "to die for". Besides the best canned food on the market, blended for easy consumption, just check out the latest addition to my comforts--an even softer, cozier place to take my daytime naps. Mom loves me so much (as she did Katie, too).

These days with Mom!

2010-01-30T17:29:00.002-07:00

1/30/10 For about a week now, especially since the sun has been shining more, Mom and I have done really well. Recently, however, Mom hit a rocky patch since just the other day she got to scrub my little area of the kitchen three times. Seems that pushed her almost to tears. During this week, Mom has seemed so busy I've not asked her to help me with the blog, but now I need to get her to do so mostly in order to remind her once again how much I appreciate all that she does for me. At night I'm having some troubles finding that perfect position for sound sleeping. This keeps Mom awake way more than is humanly healthy. So she's trying different things to see what can help me sleep better, thus making for a healthier life for herself. Since it seems almost like I'm getting my days and nights mixed up, I'm finding myself being gently awakened now earlier than usual and spending more time outside during the days. We haven't taken a walk for a while since the last few didn't seem very much fun for me. Carla mentioned when I last was groomed that a bit of an aspirin before bedtime might help my aches and pains so I could be more comfortable. And the last two nights it really seems to have helped.
As usual I'm so happy, so enjoying the beautiful purple, blue, green with a bit or orange/rose and silver of the confident self when Mom is experiencing 'now' as I do and learning to love herself as much as she loves me.

Weathering the storm with Mom!

2010-01-23T11:18:00.002-07:00

1/20/10 Guess what! The rain let up just in time right after lights out for me to go outside to pee. Then in the wee hours of the morning I didn't have to get wet either. Mom was ready, though, she found jackets with hoods for both of us--boy did we both look ridiculous. But we wouldn't have gotten wet, nor will we when the bigger storm comes later this week. We both took the window of sunshine opportunity today to get our walks. And at bedtime there was no rain yet, so good day all around.
1/21/10 I sure didn't care for the cold, white wet stuff I had to wade through to pee this morning. In fact I made a U-turn immediately and Mom brought me back in until later. On these dark days I feel more like sleeping than even eating. Mom had to go through some serious stress, concern, worry over the predictions of wind and flooding from the snow melting in the high country. It didn't take her too long to calm down though, after she remembered Who is really in charge. She may be okay to go on without me soon after all. As her 'reward' the winds seemed to let up around midnight.
1/22/10 This night I simply could not find a comfortable position. I must have tossed and turned for hours. Mom was patient but I know it takes a toll on her 'good' sleep.
1/23/10 The days sure do whiz by quickly--in spite of the fact that they sometimes feel like they're 'dragging'! Looks like the storms might be over and I'm really happy about that, but it seems lots colder today.

These days with Mom!

2010-01-19T19:53:00.001-07:00

Black Jack: Really hard to do my business in the pouring rain!
1/17/10 I may need to begin blogging more often, as Mom wasn't too happy about another floor scrubbing even though the area is smaller. I think when urine goes under the woodwork is when she really loses it. At bedtime Mom knew I hadn't relieved myself for a very long time, but I just didn't feel like going at bedtime. Therefore, Mom felt she had to listen for me to have to go out in the night. I think in the wee hours when I finally did, she got some real sleep.
1/18/10 Today was a dreary, drizzly day and all I felt like doing was sleeping--not eating or certainly going outside to potty. The rain was, like one of Mom's Facebook friends said a 'grandmother' rain (gentle and nurturing) rather than the forceful 'grandfather' rains that Arizona so often gets but I still don't like getting wet. As my care becomes more demanding, Mom adapts as usual--I only hope she can quit feeling badly that other household chores take a back seat to my care. Now she has found a larger crate in which she fed me tonight since she had taken me outside a dozen times or more with no success. This worked well, but I DID have to go--maybe a self-fulfilling prophecy for Mom... At least this helps her not scrub the floor, but sure makes a mess of ME unless she catches it quickly. And as for my bedtime vitamin, teeth cleaning cookie, Mom has saved all the crumbs and gives me a handful hoping I can get one piece to chew. The cookie situation defies description really.
1/19/10 The sun tried to come out today, so Mom took her walk--and then I got mine too. However would someone tell me how I'm supposed to enjoy going out at night to 'do my business' when it's pouring down rain? Just don't seem to be able to find the good in that...

This Week with Mom!

2010-01-17T10:37:00.003-07:00

1/8/10 Well, I spiced life up a bit, deciding I don't want to sleep in my warm cushy beds. Instead I've found a pillow on the kitchen floor. Mom put a long pillow in the corner behind it (sort of like a padded wall!) so this is my new 'haunt'. May go back to the beds though as the bare kitchen floor is a bit cold around my edges.
1/12/10 Hey, guys, haven't wanted to bore you with what on the surface looks like a very mundane existence--eating, pottying, sleeping, pottying, eating, you get the picture. However as we dogs do I find a certain good or joy in every moment that presents itself. And if my life has a gift to give, I believe that is a biggie.
1/14/10 On this day Mom noticed that my hair has thinned even more under the sweater she has me wearing ever single day. So she lovingly put lotion on me and removed the sweater for my skin to breathe for a while. It did feel good, not only the lotion but the loving strokes. And I also loved it when she held me for 2 hrs in her lap, all wrapped in a cozy blanket. How could anyone ask for better care?
1/17/10 Have you wondered where I've been? Well when all is smooth sailing there really isn't too much to write for you--don't want to be boring afterall. Lately however Mom & I have hit some rough patches. That's when I feel it's most important to blog, to remind Mom that no matter how difficult my care seems, she is awesome!

This Week with Mom!

2010-01-07T19:39:00.002-07:00

1/3/10 Mom was a bit melancholy today. Seems it's not easy for our humans to watch us drift away in our golden years. Add to that the care and upkeep and maybe I can understand why it's not always to be totally celebratory. She did take her walk and do some computer work and after my making suggestive overtures, she got it that I wanted to get out in that warm, embracing sunshine, too. Although the walk was about 1/2 its usual length because I seem to disoriented and Mom can't quite tell how far I really do want to walk, that warmth even soothed me. I sure wish Mom would put her chair outside and spend more time outside like she used to.
1/7/10 There really hasn't been too much to report. My blogging, reminding Mom of my love and gratitude for her special care hasn't seemed quite as needed lately. Mom seems to be taking the task of my care in stride a bit better lately. This no doubt has something to do with my slowing down more and more. We have our good days and our not so good days, an accident here and there, a walk upon occasion, lots of great eats--or should I say drinks (like the yams Mom gave me today) and many, many hours of sleeping.
Of course we dogs pay no attention to time, but Mom sure seems to notice that each day is just sliding right into the next. I've made sure Mom will let you know when I decide it's time to go on to that even bigger buffet table and of course I'll keep reporting from time to time.

Beginning 2010 with Mom!

2010-01-03T08:47:00.002-07:00

I'm sure glad we dogs don't really spend time dreaming of what once was...
1/1/10 This year's first walk was even better than the last of 2009! But I think Mom has finally gotten the idea that our walks should be shorter--she had to carry me a bit longer today. But my ole 'sniffer' was able to "read" some really hot news items for the first time in a while. Good stuff!
LOTS of sleepin' today and another good night.
1/2/10 Mom decided to treat herself to a movie--something she loves to do. This always means she has to be gone for about 4 hours. She made sure I'd done my business outside and was eating before she left. But the urge just hat again while she was gone. So she returned to me skating in the urine puddle in my confined area. She didn't make too much to-do about it and I got to spend some really quality time outside taking in the 'shirt sleeve' weather. Later she took her walk but guess she figured I'd had plenty of exercise 'skating' and enough sunshine and fresh air because I didn't get my walk. I think maybe she wasn't feeling quite up to taking me.
Had a night that would have best been left in 2009...

Year End with Mom!

2010-01-01T08:03:00.001-07:00

"What dreams may come"--again...
12/31/09 What a great way to end yet another year...with Mom getting her brisk walk in the sunshine and my warmer walk later in the day. I know Mom takes me on my slow walks for me (especially since my confined area has shrunk), but I believe they are also for her--especially since I was restless, tossing in my crate virtually all night long last night. Mom let me just do it, but I know it keeps her awake. Today I began to balk during my walk, and so Mom carried me part of the way home...talk about communicating and a great partnership. Just as in any long term close relationship, Mom sees the kid I used to be when I do my version of running on my walks. After a refreshing nap, I enjoyed once more my blended food. Boy, oh boy, it would be great to CHEW again... s'pose that's what's waiting when I'm ready to go...?
Blew my perfect 'no pee' record of almost 10 days...not sure what happened, either, since Mom had me outside for a very long time. Guess the urge just came too late to go outside.
We ended the year with a near perfect sleep...

Wednesday with Mom!

2009-12-30T19:41:00.001-07:00

Black Jack: Nothing like snuggling into my soft warm blankets on these cold mornings...
12/30/09 It has taken both of us some time to get re-acclimated to the old routine but think we're getting' there. Mom got her walk yesterday during a brief sunny spell.
Since I was so very good in a more confined space during our time at Robyn's, Mom got this brilliant idea that an even smaller 'wandering area' here at home might be helpful to me. Just like all her other 'experiments' I didn't much like it at first, but in the long run it seems to be making life easier for both of us.
Man, it was a cold dreary day. Mom got to go out for coffee with her friend even though she had just switched me to a different bed and I'd not gone out since the wee hours. Even so, I slept the whole time she was gone. I love just lying around snuggled up in my blankets these days. No accidents--I'm getting the hang of being as good about going as soon as Mom puts me out like I did when we were gone

Christmas holiday with Mom!

2009-12-29T18:07:00.002-07:00

12/23-29/09 One morning Mom mistook my tossing as a need to go out to go to the bathroom, but in the cold, blowing snow I decided I'd rather go right back to bed, since I only wanted to change positions in the first place. The trip to Kingman to visit auntie Robyn was great for me although Mom got to employ her driving skills a couple of times. Not much to report during our visit other than that I was a 'perfect gentleman', doing no "no-no's" in the house and sleeping lots so Mom could really enjoy her vacation. She got to go shopping a couple of times and went to two family gatherings. The journey home was a 'sleepy drive' with clouds making the snow around us mesmerizing. Mom is appreciating the great car she has because it seems to be takin' a beatin' but keeps on tickin' well.
12/29/09 Today my dear friend Day was here again to massage Mom who needed it after no holiday exercising, too much good food and carrying me around much of the time. Day picked up that I am simply happily 'chillin' here with Mom. She told me I could choose what my 'next world' will look like and chuckled when I told her good food is the best thing I could think of... 'Course Mom already knew that. Maybe the 'beyond' will be a great place to go afterall.

Week end/trip with Mom!

2009-12-22T08:43:00.002-07:00

12/18/09 Mom enjoyed breakfast out with friends and I didn't even miss her--slept through the whole thing. Her head was stuffy and hurt so we didn't take our walks. Instead she was able to figure out some computer stuff--time consuming but challenging and therefore rewarding in the end. Pretty good night...Mom didn't refill my bowl after dinner so I dreamt of breakfast.
12/19/09 And as usual I only ate enough to tide me over for a while. I got to be outside in the sunshine for a long while several times today. Mom took a walk and then the clouds rolled in, so she chose to busy herself with packing for our Christmas holiday trip instead of taking me for my walk. But I certainly can make do with just the fresh air and sunshine. Then of course I wander around at dinner/bedtime.
12/20/09 I planned to post in the morning but even that was impossible since the day was way too busy for me to even get near the computer. Mom never finds it easy to fit all my paraphernalia PLUS Christmas presents into her little sports car for the trip to visit Auntie Robyn, Jim & of course Sugar. I keep trying to figure out how I can help her really truly relax for just a while.
12/21/09 So the trip was a bit of a challenge for Mom but very peaceful for me as you can see by the photo today. I used to have a touch of car sickness which I grew out of, thank goodness since Mom always liked to travel so much. Not without hearing or even seeing very well I no longer have to worry about a thing.

Thursday with Mom!

2009-12-18T12:49:00.001-07:00

12/17/09 What a glorious day for a walk! I'm SO glad Mom decided to do what's in her heart and take me for one. It felt like spring again. If I never get another walk this one will be the one to remember. You see, Mom has been getting lots of advice from her friends about my on-going care. Yes, she complains sometimes but I would, too. Well meaning suggestions would have her NOT taking me for my walks since they are so time consuming for Mom along with the fact that they are keeping me healthy and strong. Were she to eliminate exercising me I might just require even more care rather than shortening the time it takes me to decide to leave. But the bigger reason I like that Mom takes me for walks is that it makes her feel good to think she has done something to make my life more pleasant.
In addition my Mom is such a kind, caring human that she sees my love for her as a precious thing--much like the love between an aging spouse or parent, even sibling. She just doesn't understand how that love could be destroyed in the name of convenience. I see that white/silver/gold shimmering light of an angel when she has these thoughts.
Exercising sure whets a guy's appetite, too. I think I ate a whole can of food today. And since Mom buys me nothing but the best (over $2 a can) this is yet another way she says "I really love you".
I had a 'perfect' night, never having to go outside once--too bad Mom tossed and turned almost all night long. Oh, well, so much for being "good"...

Tuesday & Wednesday with Mom!

2009-12-17T07:33:00.002-07:00

Black Jack:: What is it that keeps me dreaming about better days instead of going there...sort of like many humans do living their lives.
12/15/09 WELL, I sure didn't need my walk today...it was grooming day. I've been wearing clothes so much to keep warm that when they bathed me and put the dryer on me it felt very strange. Then they even made me lie on my side while they worked on me and I really hate not having control enough to stand on my own four feet. I do understand that they are doing it to help make the experience more bearable for me. But as always when it's all over and done, I sure do feel better. All the rest of the day, however, I paced finally settling down pretty swiftly to a night that was only interrupted twice.
12/16/09 Not too much to report as I've got Mom pretty well trained to my schedule by now >chuckle<. It was only sunny off and on so her intentions to hang laundry outside in preparation for our holiday trip were dashed. It's always interesting to see how she fits laundry day into all her computer work that usually lasts toward lunch time without extra activities. I was happy to see her get out there and take her walk as she always feels better afterward. As I sleep more and more I just have to wonder what it is that keeps me dreaming about better days instead of going there... I understand many humans do the same thing living their lives. Sadly for Mom I seem to be needing to get up more times during the night... what can I do about that... always wanting to make life easier for her, not more difficult.

Monday with Mom!

2009-12-15T07:26:00.001-07:00

Black Jack:: Isn't this just the spirit of Christmas...ho, ho ho!?
12/14/09 The sun was shining even though there was frost on my artificial grass when Mom put me outside this morning. Once during the day Mom left me long enough to really enjoy basking in it...almost forgot why I was out there it felt so good. Mom was busy very again today but finished her second big project (a carved wooden pet urn, like only she can do) so that made her feel really good. She even got out in the sunshine for her walk. Then, having gotten so much done, she was really tired. I’m so glad I cooperated and didn't cause her any extra work like scrubbing the floor. I didn't feel like eating until late and Mom didn't refill my bowl. I think she wants me to begin eating earlier in the day. I think I might be hungry tomorrow morning. But we sure did sleep long and well all night long.

Week end with Mom!

2009-12-14T09:04:00.002-07:00

Black Jack:: Wonder what would happen if humans would feel and act like it's Christmas all year long? Seems like a strange custom to save it for only one day...
12/11/09 I was sawin' logs when Mom just had to get me going so she could go out with her friend this morning. She gradually got me used to the cold though, so it was okay. Mom got to take her walk but I didn't--instead she worked on her special gift project.
12/12/09 Mom needed to get me up before I was ready since I'd gone out very early in the morning. Seems she was going out yet again to be with another friend. She was gone longer than usual and so I was beginning to wonder where she was by the time she got home. Luckily she was just in time to get me outside before an accident so we were both happy. Mom was especially happy since she came home with presents for people. Seems strange to me that humans save one day a year to be really nice to one another by giving. Wonder what would happen if they would feel and act this way all year long?
12/13/09 Over this long, busy and very interesting week end, Mom listened to some suggestions from several friends that they feel might help me leave and Mom take better care of herself. I just may not get so many walks and may need to work my schedule into Mom's better. Regardless of what may come, I sense a brighter, stronger color around Mom now--a strength and determination replacing that rather discouraging feelings that have been apparent for a long while. I believe this change may have some thing to do with a conference call Mom had with Auntie Robyn & Jim about what might be next. I see that Mom certainly is preparing herself for me to leave, even if it will be hard for her to be without me.

Wednesday & Thursday with Mom!

2009-12-11T07:08:00.002-07:00

Black Jack:: It's about time to put on our Santa suits again!
12/9/09 Just trying to stay warm today... With clouds blocking the sun it feels much colder than it probably is. Neither of us had our walk today. Mom is also trying to stay warm and when her art room warmed up with what sun there was, she finally did some carving on an urn for a change. It's good to see her enjoy her creative gift, but only when she is moved to do it. I know when the love between animals and their humans is involved she is more inclined to get absorbed in her projects.
12/10/09 There was a walk in the clouds and a walk in the sunshine today. Mom chose to bundle up and do the former making my walk much more pleasant. One smell I want to take with me is the crisp dry leaves that people had raked into piles. It reminds me of times gone by. All that exercise and fresh air sure work up this old man's appetite. I finally really chowed down today. In the evening Mom worked on a special surprise Christmas present. She doesn't get too many decorations out any more since we are the only ones here. We had an awesome night...I almost slept the whole night long.

Monday & Tuesday with Mom!

2009-12-09T08:22:00.001-07:00

Black Jack:: Here's a new geriatric wrinkle...falling asleep in one's food bowl. Can you imagine how much face cleanin' this took?!
12/7/09 Cold, dreary days don't usually glean much excitement to write about. But boy the rain and wind kicked into full gear overnight. Mom was more relaxed about the length of time it took me to settle in, once again trying everything. She put me in her bed at one point, I think more for herself than for me. I do believe she was looking for comfort from the storm. It's tough for her to be the only one responsible for seeing that nothing blows away or is damaged, so her night was short and fitful.
12/8/09 Then the sun came out. Very brisk but not too much wind for my walk. Decided I didn't want to do the whole thing at one time, though. She tugged on me enough to show me the way that the coat I had on kept opening so she had to re-do the velcro. Think she's decided to see to it that I do more during the day than just sleep so that maybe I'll be more tired at night when she likes to sleep. I do try to be good...
Mom was more relaxed about the time it took me to settle in and then it was a very good night since there was no wind to keep Mom worried. She was even able to let go of one more incident of computer frustration and the resulting feeling of isolation from her 'virtual family'.

Week end with Mom!

2009-12-07T08:44:00.002-07:00

Black Jack: Morning cuddles--great for our cold, rainy weather.
12/5/09 I tried so hard to not have to get out of my warm bed this morning. But Mom let me sleep in her arms until the urge was too strong to ignore. Think she feels like she can anticipate better when I need to go that way.
Man, Mom has me so bundled up against the cold that I walk sort of like a little piggy. And it's probably pretty funny from some perspective to see how I certainly can't get up when I roll over. But I don't feel too badly, since after my walk Mom went for hers and she looked almost as roly poly as I do!
Poor Mom, all squeaky clean and cozy, having to scrub the kitchen floor. Seems she took pity on me from the cold again too soon--before the urge hit. AND Mom relaxed a bit too well just before bedtime, so the kitchen floor is gradually shining from all the scrubbing...
12/6/09 Not much to report today except that I watched Mom busy herself with some holiday stuff and cooking her granola... more time to 'be'... UNTIL night came, that is--what a change for lovely peaceful colors to dark stormy ones. Mom stayed up later than usual with a project and I think she was trying to outsmart my behaviors. Normally I relieve myself around 8 and then again a couple of hours later (normally AFTER I've been tucked into bed). She observed the 8 pm pee and so after 10 she took me out and waited...and waited...and waited. I just didn’t feel like going, no matter how hard I tried. She put me in the kitchen where I went sound asleep. In order to know if I need care in the night, she puts me in the bedroom where I immediately acted as if I wanted to get out of bed. So she tried outside then the kitchen but nothing seemed to work until about midnight. I must report that Mom 'lost her cool' over having to put her full attention on trying to figure out what I want/need for 2 whole hours of her sleeping time. I think she was especially upset because she thought maybe we could actually avoid having to go out in the middle of the night. I know her love for me never waivers but she really hates what my age is doing to me...

Friday with Mom!

2009-12-05T07:23:00.002-07:00

12/4/09 Boy, I'm not liking this cold weather--other than the extra cuddling I'm getting from Mom, that is. She went out to enjoy the company of one of her friends today, but wasn't gone very long. I was snuggled into my bed with my undershirt and a coat on. I had just gotten up when she returned.
It was another day of frustrations for Mom, but she rallied with a special Christmas project and some potentially good news about what could be next for her. She kept an eye on me all the while so we didn't have any accidents at all.
Mom was told it's supposed to get warmer and rain lots in a few days--I'll let you know which I like more, the cold or the rain. I know Mom isn't fond of being cold, thus our staying in all day long today--other than freezing outside for bathroom duty, that is.
I pulled an all nighter--that is I actually slept all night long. And who would want to climb out of a warm bed to go out in the freezing cold and squat? In fact Mom had to put an extra blanket on me in the middle of the night so my bed was extra cozy then.

Wednesday & Thursday with Mom!

2009-12-04T13:19:00.001-07:00

Black Jack: How do you like my new winter 'undershirt'?
12/2/09 In an attempt to figure out what makes me so restless at night, Mom turned off the heat in my bed, so I was sort of chilly when I woke up. Of course Mom snuggled me awake and put me back in a warm cozy bed where I stayed once again until she got back with groceries. Once today Mom was working so hard she couldn't get away before the urge hit me to pee on the floor. So she didn't get mad at me at all. I still had to wait outside in the cold until the mopped floor dried, though. And speaking of cold, here in Arizona it's so cold Mom & I sometimes feel like we won't ever get warm again. Makes one want to go to bed already--at least when it's heated for me like Mom does. It was a very good night with several hours on undisturbed sleep for Mom.
12/3/09 Once again I was snuggled awake. Yesterday Mom finally found an old sweater that I had refused to wear for a long time. She feels, rightly so, that it will be more comfortable for every day wear than the shirts. I wouldn't wear it when my eyesight was going because I didn't want anyone touching my legs. But now I am resigned to letting Mom carefully, gently handle me. So not I have an 'undershirt' to wear.
Mom took her walk...beautiful day, but then the wind came up. And that wind was so cold, Mom opted to make the walk short which suited me since I don't really like the icy (for AZ) wind blowing up my shirt. Besides I was pretty stuff legged and wobbly, so Mom got all the messages loud and clear. Mom almost forgot to eat before the computer fixer/friend came. Tony was awesome...not just because he helped Mom with her computer but because he seemed to really care about me--and we all know 'dog people' are really cool.
We got a full 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep last night before I had to go out--think Mom might just celebrate!

Monday & Tuesday with Mom!

2009-12-02T08:07:00.001-07:00

11/30/09 Got to awaken being cuddled in my warm blanket. Later, Mom gave me a good massage. It felt good to get the fancy shirt off for a bit since I wear it all the time now. Originally it was to keep the sun off, now to help keep me warm. Then she put a clean shirt back on--I really, really get them dirty with my sloppy eating. Guess I need a bib like a baby!
Today was the day for Day to come and give Mom her massage. I love Day and really appreciate seeing her--especially today. She always helps Mom get messages from me. Today I made it clear that I'm no longer feeling much of anything. Day thought I was being stubborn staying this long, but that's just not in my nature. I'm the easy going type. So together they figured out that I just love Mom so fiercely that I simply don't want to leave her. Apparently one CAN love another too much since I know I'd be more free and happy on the other side. Hey, just figured out that if I'm numb in body as well as mind, maybe that's why my legs wobble and don't support me very well. Guess one would say the colors are a now a dim white, silver, gold glimmering light of angels. Perhaps they will shimmer more brightly soon.
The night was awful. I kept thinking about what Day had helped me realize and was only happy after Mom put me in bed with her. Sadly this left Mom with a sleepless night, too.
12/1/09 I was really tired today of course and so after 'duty call' Mom put me back in my 'kitchen bed' where I stayed until she got home from a short trip! Of course Mom was really, really tired, too but she had to go. Strangely she had the energy to take her walk and then take me, too. Since she could do this for us/me I did my walk well even finding some sniffs. Our night started like last night, but Mom made it clear she wasn't going to be able to do the 'no sleep' thing again, so I finally got nested and we did well.Mo

Week end with Mom!

2009-11-30T12:13:00.003-07:00

Black Jack: Found a new corner and position for sleeping...

11/28/09 Mom sure had a hard day dealing not only with a couple of things with her new computer that just wouldn't work, but also not feeling well at all.. At least I behaved very well and we had a good night's sleep.

11/29/09 Today was a different story altogether. Seems Mom really is learning some good coping skills. She put aside the computer problems since she has things she really wants to do instead of the continual frustrating trying which has seemed to be how her life has been spent mostly. She figured out an alternative temporary solution to yesterdays' problem. This seems to have made all the difference.

We took our walks, mine before the cold wind came up. I wonder if I'll get raindrops on my head when I go out for bedtime potty call like I did last night--I don't much like that! No wetness, but pretty darn cold for Arizona.

Thanksgiving holiday with Mom!

2009-11-28T11:41:00.001-07:00

Blank

Black Jack: And this is how I spent my Thanksgiving...also planning to do lots more of it!

11/25/09 Yes, after only one time outside and the heat turned on in my bed it was a beautiful night--the white, silver, gold of angels is back. AND it lasted all day long.

11/26/09 I spent most of my day basking in the sunshine. Mom went to a friend's house for turkey dinner. I was pretty darn lonely when she got back, but she gave me some 'real' turkey so all was well

11/27/09 Today Mom left and brought back a new computer so my blogging was put on hold even longer. But she knows how important it is to me to share with you, so I think we're back in good shape now. I know it gave Mom a real headache getting things all set up but boy she sure is good at this stuff--even if she has to learn some of it the hard way. We're both hoping you had a great Thanksgiving with lots of love around you!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

2009-11-26T10:04:00.002-07:00

All I want to say today is that I'm grateful for my long, happy life AND that Mom chose ME! I'm a really lucky guy!!

Tuesday with Mom!

2009-11-25T08:49:00.001-07:00

11/25/09 Lately Mom has started my days by snuggling me in her arms. Her robe is so soft and cuddly I love it since the house is chilly enough that I shiver in the mornings. Besides that the mornings are cold for going to the bathroom. So to gradually awaken, feel the urge and acclimate myself to a new day is greatly appreciated. Bet there are lots of people/animals who would like this kind of pampering...

Rather than being slow and tedious, Mom & I decided to call my walks as well as most of my other activities in these 'twilight years' "gentle". It seems a nicer approach to my being ness now. However when nighttime came, the beautiful orange, rose and silver of this realization turned to the red, black of a warrior after Mom got to scrub the kitchen floor for a second time right at bedtime. My pretty colors will come back.

Long week end with Mom!

2009-11-24T12:08:00.001-07:00

Black Jack: I'm practicing for eating some of Mom's leftover Turkey!

11/24/09 Sheesh! Apparently in ALL of Mom's recent computer problems, my notes from the week end got deleted. Well, not too much to report...life isn't exciting in the same way at age 90 as it was when I was a kid.

The other night I accidentally got the tip of one of Mom's fingers in my teeth again. It wasn't quite as bad for her as last time since I think she has become faster. She just hates to see me struggling to find, then pick up and keep those cookie morsels in my mouth.

Yesterday's walk found me wobbling like crazy...actually I had my food on my mind. Then again it's hard to walk in a straight line when you can't even see the line anymore.

I'm getting ready for Thanksgiving because I know Mom will share some of her leftovers from going to her 'coffee buddy's' house. Hopefully I'll be able to keep THAT in my mouth and get it chewed.

Friday with Mom!

2009-11-21T11:59:00.003-07:00

Black Jack: It's good to be alive! In light of two of my animal friends passing yesterday, I'm so grateful to have had the long life I' have been blessed with--and helping keep Mom on track >he he<.

11/20/09 Oh, my, I sure am letting more poo's slip... I've been doing that almost every morning and Mom seems to handle the stinky bed better than the wet bed. Of course wet smells bad to her, too. When she chose to take me for my walk before she did her own, I let a few slip as soon as she put me down. And I couldn't really decide whether I wanted to continue the walk or not, so I got only about 1/2 a walk today. But the day was awesome so it was good to be outside even for a bit. It's good to be alive! Especially since Mom got word today that Nikki pass as well as another friend's dear cat.

Mom tried everything to make me happy in the evening. She fed me, took me out (I fell asleep outside in the cold), put me in bed, held me, but all I could think of was my bedtime cookie. I finally did eat more of my dinner.

Only up a few times during the night--no accidents for a while.

Thursday with Mom!

2009-11-20T13:21:00.003-07:00

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Okay, so if Mom's too busy tocover me up I'll just get my nose under those covers and do it myself!

11/19/09 I slept really late today after being up at 5 a.m. to do my 'duties'. I almost didn't do my blog today since Mom has been having so much computer trouble. But better late than never, I guess. We both got our walks. Mine was in partial sunshine so again really comfortable. Mom got interrupted with a business call and so her walk was later than she planned. It was getting cold and a bit more 'dusk' than she likes to be out. And to top it off, I just couldn't hold it until she got back.

I ate everything in front of me and was looking for more. Mom about gave it to me, too but knew I'd had enough. Think I'm glad. Then as Mom was finally getting some relaxation time, attention on something other than me, I had to go again. She really doesn't like having two mishaps in the same day. She reacts to just one and so you might say she over reacts when I do two or more. At least I messed up a spot that hadn't needed scrubbing for a while (other than my foot prints...).

Wednesday with Mom!

2009-11-19T14:06:00.001-07:00

11/18/09 Today at breakfast I notice Mom had scrubbed the whole wall behind where I eat and then covered it with a plastic. I guess it must bother her to look at my brown food smears all over the white wall.
Another sunshiney day, so both Mom and I got our walks. I was so ready by the time Mom got off the phone to Susan. Seems Nikki may get to come home today--whew! Our humans sure do wrap their lives around us. The walk was awesome--I felt as if I could go forever. Of course I knew food was waiting at home, too. The shade was almost too cool while the sun warmed me just right.
Supper was yummy.
Mom provided a warmed bed for me. I remember that she did that a few winters for Katie & me and I sure do like it. Makes the bed a bit less soft (heating pad beneath me), but the snuggly warmth is worth it. Last year she used an electric blanket, but this year I think she's afraid I might do my business on it, so a heating pad would be better. Well, guess what! it was a bit too warm. Winter isn't quite here yet. I was able to sleep more comfortably when she turned it back off leaving my coat and blanket on me instead.

Monday & Tuesday with Mom!

2009-11-18T09:31:00.001-07:00

11/16/09 Today seemed like a 'crisis day' for Mom. She was able to get me outside, fed and back to bed before she had to leave. We both did get our walks later in the day, since she wasn't able to work at her computer because she had taken it to the 'computer doctor'. It was an amazingly 'perfect' fall day again. No worries the rest of the day and maybe just a bit more attention from Mom since the computer was missing.
11/17/09 What wild and crazy days! Mom had to go get her computer this morning. Then she left me outside way too long and even though it is fall the Arizona sunshine is a bit too warm to be out in it too long--at least for me.
I think something is wrong at my friend Susan's house across the street. Mom is going over there a couple of times a day. I have a sad feeling it might be because of Nikki, Susan's little white dog. If that's the case, Mom is caring for Susan's birds which I know she isn't comfortable with. But Susan cares for me when Mom has to be gone very long so it's 'the neighborly thing to do'. Even though Nikki seems a bit obnoxious to me at my age, and she pees with excitement every time she sees us, she's just a youngster and I sure hope she gets better soon. Now that the computer wildness has settled down again this extra responsibility won't feel quite so daunting to Mom.
At least we are having very good nights sleeping which I'm sure helps.

Week end with Mom!

2009-11-16T13:02:00.001-07:00

11/14/09 Okay, so I was shivering a bit today...Mom put a fleece-lined denim coat that once belonged to Katie on me for my walk. I didn't realize how much bigger she must have been than I was. Mom thought my balking at taking a walk might have been that I could barely waddle in that coat--that is until she got me to my backyard where I had to poo. Seems these days I only want to do my jobs in my own back yard. It even took me days to figure out that I could go in Auntie Robyn's yard when we visit her. Strange perhaps, when most of us dogs like to go anywhere and frequently, but for whatever reason it seems to be a strong preference for me now.
Yahoo! It was a dry night with sounds sleep other than getting Mom up only once for a potty call.
11/15/09 Today looked like it might just be another too quiet day. But Mom fed me fresh food that I ate while she walked and then she came home and took me for my walk. It was one of those almost perfect Arizona days with the sun warming my skin and the crisp breeze blowing through what is left of my hair. There weren't too many headlines to sniff out in our quiet neighorhood--either that or my 'sniffer' isn't up to snuff.
One more really good night, only going outside once then sleeping as late as Mom needed me to.

11/16/09 Today seemed like a 'crisis day' for Mom. She was able to get me outside, fed and back to bed before she had to leave.

Thursday & Friday with Mom!

2009-11-14T09:05:00.003-07:00

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I remember when I could stand on my own two back feet and beg like the best of them. And just look at that silky black coat! We old guys sometimes just get wobbly legs and thinning hair...

11/12/09 Not much to report on this cloudy, blustery Arizona day. All went pretty well. Mom got out of the house for a bit and brought a few groceries back, along with some more ear medicine. I sure hope like she does that since it helps me not be so restless, for both our sakes. Well, it didn't work this night...not sure what the problem was. Had to go out a couple of times and then tossed and turned but at least it wasn't the ear.

11/13/09 This was a dreary, drizzly day and I really don't much like water drops falling on my head when I'm trying to go to the bathroom. Just imagine! So I held it as long as I could. Mostly slept today...then couldn't hold it any longer and again it was at bedtime of course. Mom was even more unhappy with my weak bladder when I did it again immediately after I'd been outside in the cold drizzle for so long a time Mom's sympathy won out. Guess she needs to be tougher, sad to say.

It seems to Mom like one day is just another version of the last sometimes. And indeed they may be, but in every tiny moment there are things to cherish and be grateful for--like remembering good times as in the picture. Mom often feels she needs something to look forward to in order to be enthusiastic. I sure hope she works more on being in the present moments as she knows she must.

Tuesday & Wednesday with Mom!

2009-11-12T07:57:00.002-07:00

Black Jack: What a difference a decade makes--especially in a dog's life, eh?!

11/10/09 It was hard for Mom after Robyn left, mostly because the house got really quiet. She went for her walk but felt sorta down the rest of the day. It could have had something to do with my restlessness all night long, however. It was good that she finally rested in the afternoon. I thought for a while that I'd get to go for my walk but it got too cold and dark too soon. Mom asked me to forgive her for just not feeling like it, and I always have and always will of course.
Interesting how very much it affects Mom when someone she loves is hurting in any way... These humans sure do live complicated lives. At the end of the day I was restless again and for about 2 hours Mom tried everything she knew to do, finally putting some medicine in my ear. Maybe she'll get some more so she can do that more often...and get to sleep more.
11/11/09 I find that I'm not feeling like posting my blog entries quite as often these days because one day seems to meld into the next. I'm so glad I don't let that get to me like Mom does. Seems that if she doesn't have some thing to look forward to, she gets a little down. Now that sure isn't living in this very special moment of now like we dogs do, is it? I do believe that is one of the many reasons I'm sticking around...to be sure she 'gets' it.
Both of us got our walks today--gorgeous weather. I don't much like the loose, crunchy leaves under my feet but Mom really does, going out of her way to scrunch them.
Kitchen floor sure smelled good today--TWO scrubbings!

Very long week end with Mom!

2009-11-10T12:11:00.001-07:00

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11/7/09 Mom was busy doing laundry and getting ready for Auntie Robyn to visit, so I didn't eat much and just went back to bed after morning 'duties. Only chowed down late in the afternoon. By then Mom had lost her steam and didn't really feel all that great--think it may have had something to do with the wind coming up.

11/8/09 Both of us were up early and boy, that dusk time of day is cold! So shocking it's hard to do my business and shiver at the same time. Sometimes Mom and I get our communication wires crossed. I made sure I stayed really 'laid back' so Mom and Auntie Robyn could talk and watch tv together most of the day after she arrived. Robyn seemed to really need to talk lots with Mom. I believe it had something to do with Jim's family and his not getting to come. I have to give Mom credit for fixing me more food when I finished up. I made sure to stand right by her legs so she wouldn't miss the clue that I was still hungry when I finished my first dish of food.

11/9/09 Whew! Mom and Auntie Robyn sure stayed busy during this day. They were in and out all day long--eating, shopping and bunches of talking! I was a very good boy...only having a couple of accidents before bedtime last night.