9/27/10 Mom felt like my dying simply “ripped a piece right out of her heart” I know, but I keep telling her we had it all. What’s really important is to remember that we both filled one another’s hearts so full and blessed one another so much during our many years together. I immediately and for almost two months now have kept telling Mom that I am very happy and busy, so she did begin feeling better right away. My love still surrounds and inspires her just as it did when I was there in body. Nevertheless she has felt like she’s sort of been floundering. You see, Mom has always strived to be her best, to serve in the greatest capacity. Without me to care for she has felt as if she needs to be doing more than just nurturing herself, going into that quiet place where she can get the answers for moving forward in the best direction for her. Well, I sure did ‘message’ her the other day! She took a few minutes to journal (when she was not feeling it would be under the pressure of a “should”). Her mind finally went blank for further writing so she got up discouraged that her writing hand didn’t give her any more clues.
This time an email offered her an inspiration. It relieved her to realize that being gentle with herself, simply asking for guidance and then letting the answers happen is the very best way for her to be living right now. No striving, struggle, pushing, impatiently trying to force ‘getting on with’ her life—as quite frankly has always been her inclination.
Although Mom does very little cooking, a cooking blog movie had moved Mom to begin blogging about my aging and care, eventually giving me the reins to write it through her. So this time, ironically (no accident, really) a cooking blog writer began by sharing some very personal feelings which gave Mom the idea once again. She thought, “Maybe it’s time to get back to blogging again…it would keep me writing not only to satisfy that creative urge, but also give me more impetus to ‘journal’, getting in touch with myself on a deeper level.”
Then I ‘suggested’ she tap into her Higher self and let that energy fuel the new blogging.
So today I, Black Jack, do hereby turn over Mom’s care and ‘feeding’ to Judy…(never fear, I won’t be far away—ever). Now you may say, “Well, Mom IS Judy”, but I’m talking about the “mini-Judy” if you will--the wise, innocent child Judy. Some folks call it their ‘inner child’, I believe.
Have fun, Mom! I’ll be playing right along beside you!!
Mom was so excited to begin that she could hardly sleep that night!
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