2/27/11 #6 Is love enough…?
Katie Lou and Mom are both ready to tell her story now. They both have been reluctant because it’s sort of painful to remember this part of their time together. Katie’s ancestors were Lhasa Apsos that Mom would discover too late not only had physical/neurological problems, but also tended toward aggression.
“I was separated from Mom for a short period during my puppyhood, but she embraced me with her whole heart when I returned, even unkempt and flea ridden” Katie reveals.
“Early in my life I began teaching her what my boundaries were—for example, I wanted little to no attention once I had ’settled in’ for the night or I’d ‘come up fighting’. I always tried not to hurt her too much even in that state of grogginess. I also felt compelled to nip at other people sometimes,” she confesses, “until I became COMPLETELY unpredictable, which was doubly dangerous since I was too cute to resist >smile<. Eventually I had to be ‘quarantined’ during ANYONE’S visit!” 
Then there was the shock collar incident Mom has a hard time talking about when she got talked into because Katie barked too much at a friend’s neighbors. I do believe she may have lost a little more of her mind over this. Katie suggests, “Humans really ought to try it on themselves sometime! When Mom reached her hand under my chin later on that day, without thinking, I reacted so fast I drew blood, but still Mom kept right on loving me!” 
“Eventually Mom thought maybe I was having some sort of ear problem or perhaps even bad teeth because I did it again—a more severe bite and to make it worse, I couldn’t seem to let go this time!” exclaims Katie. This reaction was NOT understandable to either of them. Katie’s health was excellent, so Mom got her checked out and her teeth cleaned which helped for a while.
She goes on, “When I wasn’t having these episodes, I loved to love on Mom, cuddle, and be a normal canine ‘kid’ especially thrilled with ‘mothering’ all my stuffed toys. I even played with Black Jack sometimes. More often as time passed, though, I bullied him and made his life to be a bit like hell.”
So Mom simply had to do something. One of the pet communicators she sought out, who also tried a sort of electric type of therapy a sort of re-programming presumably, claimed to discover that in a past life I was devoured by my off-spring. “Well that would most certainly have given me a bad attitude for this life!” Kate shouts.
Another endeavor to control her behavior was obedience training, which was probably the most traumatic attempt to solve the problem. Mom was advised that all dogs need to be shown who is in charge. “Consequently for months we lived a nightmare nightly as Mom followed this program rigidly, keeping me CAGED through the night. I know she is now so sorry (more of that ‘guilt’) she listened to anyone other than her own heart. You see I had always had a phobic fear of being caged—even at the groomers.” She sadly admits, “It felt like I literally lost even more of her mind through this ordeal.”
“Our lives became so unbearable that Mom actually considered assisting me to LEAVE. Even when not caged, I began wandering the house at night barking at random and so Mom very rarely slept during these several years. She tried comforting me, even lying on the floor beside me, but nothing worked”, she continues. “I so much appreciate Mom for making a total commitment to me for my entire lifetime even at her own expense. But then regardless of this tormented time together she and I both knew we had an inexplicable bond that went even deeper than any of her other dogs.”
With sadness, she says, “Then just before my 16th birthday it was finally time…that day after my daily walk, my body suddenly also began to fail. I was weak and didn’t want to eat or drink anything. Although Mom nursed me for days and had a vet try, her gifted healer friend told her I trusted her to quickly give me release not only from this physical decline but the mental agony as well. Since I was nearly uncontrollable in spite of my physical weakness, the kind vet who put me out of my misery for Mom told her it appeared to him that I may have had a brain tumor.”
There are so many messages for everyone in this story such as all the what ifs of hindsight… inbreeding… foresight (medical advancements now available)… mostly though, that love transcends all…
P.S. she adds, “I’ll have Mom write about my angels sometime.”
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