Week end with Mom!

9/26/09 After relieving myself around 5 a.m. I went back to bed. I know Mom was thinking she should get me up so my life won't be so boring. It seems sad to her, being a human, that all I do is sleep, eat, take care of bodily functions and sleep again--with my walk and treats my only excitement. I appreciate that all my life she has tried to figure out 'jobs' and activities for me to do (the tricks and responsibilities mentioned earlier). Now I need for her to realize I love my life just exactly the way it is and that she needs to take care of herself by not worrying about me quite so much. We dogs spend our time so solidly in the 'now' that all else falls away.

This afternoon I felt more active than usual so Mom got to be okay with my sitting around instead of sleeping so much. She kept giving me little treats--my only joy (other than walking which we couldn't do today because it got late and so too hot).

Then another accident! I know Mom is aware that I've spent my entire life trying to be 'good' so as to make everyone around me happy. I as sure of this because she pretty much lived the early part of her life the same way. She seems to be overcoming it little by little, however. So while I would never intentionally cause anyone harm or distress it has become more important to me, too, to be just who I am. My silent darkness and aging organs sometimes make it a challenge to keep us both happy.

Oops! One more mopping before bedtime. Guess the drinking I've been doing to please Mom isn't so pleasing to her in the long run. When I was outside waiting for the floor to dry, I didn't have anything better to do than sit in our fake grass with my face resting on it--so Mom tended to think I was sad for having another accident when it was over immediately afterward for me. It's very interesting to us dogs how humans try to interpret our supposed facial expressions and some of our behaviors in terms of their own. For example when I used to hang my head and put on a 'guilty face' whenever one of us dogs did something that displeased Mom, she had to learn that I wasn't necessarily the culprit, just that this was my reaction. Now when I hang my head, I wish she knew, just like not being guilty, I'm not necessarily sad or depressed. Once again I believe Mom and I were meant to spend these many years together because this is one of the things Mom needs to get over--feeling responsibile even when she had nothing to do with what happened.

9/27/09 Boy, oh boy, oh boy! I got to do my 'bunny hop' walk this morning. She let me sniff just as much as I wanted to. I no longer can 'read' as much in those smells as I used to be able to, but sure did get the 'general gist' of what has been going on outside my kitchen and back yard. Pretty quiet day until the evening began. I was SO restless and then I overate. Well, put that together and neither Mom nor I got to sleep until midnight (about 3 to 4 hours past bedtime). Mom tried everything including taking me outside, comforting me and even putting me in bed, but nothing worked. Maybe I won't overeat again...and maybe Mom will even ration my portions from now on in the evenings.